After a weekend of turmoil, my Monday was filled with planning and scheming.

My first stop this morning was Sylvan. I sat down with the executive director and told him what had gone on, and we discussed options in dealing with it. He told me they would provide testing results, letters, even testimony on our behalf to get Addison back into classes. He told me there are case precedents that the court had ordered the child attend Sylvan in situations very similar to ours.

That was encouraging!

Next stop was a meeting with a retired judge. He had a very hard time comprehending a parent that would deny a child this sort of opportunity. We discussed options and he told me that first of all I didn't want a good lawyer. I want a vicious lawyer who will pull every string to win. He said all to often lawyers get to feeling sorry for someone like the lady that gave birth to Addie and they lay off when they should go for the throat. He encouraged me to push the DA with the grand jury pertaining to Scott's pending indictments. He thinks that since it is multiple counts, it will be a slam dunk and with Scott's record, the penal system should have saved his "short stripes".

I was amazed with how this man's mind worked. He laid out a plan from square one that will achieve all the goals we want and need to achieve for Addie. It will be a four prong attack that will go from criminal to civil and finally family court after forming an alliance with Addie's Dad. He says if it is worked correctly that Makai will never be able to rent an apartment, or finance a vehicle and if she ever has anything paid for, we can take it, and more than likely Makai will have to pay child support.

Lovely. I just love it when a plan comes together.

Meme and I are missing the little toot. As much work as she was, it was very worth it to see her Saturday coming down the steps from Sylvan with a big smile on her face!

Meme and I were talking and I was telling her that just prior to the doorbell ringing Saturday afternoon. Addison and I were working on the computers in the office and she wanted to go next door to see the neighbors small children. They are about five, three and one and a half. I told her that she didn't need to go over there and she responded, "Meme divided them!"

Huh? She repeated herself, "Meme divided them".

I told her I had no idea what she was talking about. Finally she told me "Meme divided them over to swim".

I tried to explain the difference between invited and divided.

What a precious little girl!

I suppose the one draw back in pursuing our course of action is knowing that Addison will pay the price until we get her out of there. But the final reward should be worth it if we can catch her education up.

I spent the balance of my day at K.O.'s working on the project. With the exception of some grinding and cleaning up, we are ready for the rebuild. I even took the forklift and held the new diesel engine up, checking clearances and possible methods of mounting it. I think it is going to be trick! If it works anything like what we expect it to, it will be outstanding.

Wednesday night the lead fabricator will be in, and Thursday two more will be arriving. If the lead fabricator and I can keep the other two along with K.O. busy, we should be ready to fire and test it before the end of the weekend. It may not have all the sheet metal, it won't be painted, but we can check out the mechanical workings to be sure all systems are go.

We have four weeks until it has to be at it's next show.

I talked with Rian briefly today and he said he had received on call updating him on the job possibilities. Surprisingly, the one that was supposed to get back to him today, has not called. Just to hedge his bet, he talked with the Frenship Superintendent and told him he was interviewing for two possible job opportunities. The Super said even if it went by the July 1 date Rian's release shouldn't be a problem.

Hope you had a day! Pray for Addison and what is best for her!

FATHER, thank YOU for friends, thank YOU for professionals, thank YOU for wise men who dispense and share their knowledge. Bless us our efforts as we pursue what is best for Addison.

Saturday morning I woke Miss Addie and told her she needed to get her bath and wash her hair.

"You have an hour and a half until you have to be at Sylvan", I said.

"What time is it Dandy?", she asked.

"Eight o'clock", I replied.

"I can't believe I slept to eight", she exclaimed.

As I walked from her room I told her, "Get going, you need to eat some breakfast too!"

While she was bathing, I hopped in my truck and made a quick run to the golden arches breakfast club and picked up breakfast for the whole house. Of course I have learned that Miss Addie will eat about twice as much as I do, so the bulk of it was hers.

When I walked in the house she was getting dressed and I put her breakfast on a plate and put it at her place at the dining table. I went to the back of the house to get ready to take her to school. When I emerged from my room, Meme had brushed Addie's hair and Addie was working on her last sausage biscuit.

Addie and I loaded up in Meme's SUV and headed for Sylvan.

When we arrived there, we joined six other students and their parents in the waiting room. After a brief wait, a young man came in and began calling names and giving table assignments. Addie was the third name called and assigned to table #9. After Addie went back, I talked briefly with Johanna and gave her a check for the first month. I left and returned to the house. Meme was getting ready because we had planned a brief list of "things to do" once we retrieved Addison from school at eleven-thirty.

When we drove up at Sylvan, Meme went up to get Addie. When Addison came down the stairs, she was beaming! I think this has been one of my biggest thrills, watching her "feel good" about herself.

We left Sylvan and went to a swimming pool supply. Krl has had a zodiac vacuum and while it was good in the beginning, it has been fading fast. We walked in and she told the salesman exactly what she wanted. "Give me a Lady Bug auto vac". Addie was very excited as she inspected the picture on the box.

From there we headed to Wal Mart. We had a short list of what we needed, but ended up splitting up with two baskets. Meme went to the pharmaceutical section while Addie and I went looking for fish sticks and some lunch pack burritos. By the time Meme found us we had expanded our list several times over. Addie and I had also decided we would have chili dogs for supper (more common ground).

Meme wasn't feeling too well and Addie had bought ice cream for "Coke floats", so we made our way home to put up groceries.

Addie and I hauled them in, Meme put them up. When we were through Meme laid down while Addie and I began assembling the new lady bug! When we were done, Addie and I went into our office to try to get a website she wanted on my computer. My desktop computer is very sensitive. It really has some issues, but for what I use it for, it usually does o.k., however if you pull a website up that has a lot of animation, you can bet your bottom dollar that it is going to give you an error message and close the program. Time after time, it would close. So, being the good Dandy I am, I decided to hook Meme's computer to the internet. We have a wireless router, but since we have been home I have not been able to find the power supply cord for it. I know it will surface. I made the decision to hard wire Meme's computer in with network cable. For some reason, I could never make it complete the connection. I pulled out my new laptop and the same thing occurred. I don't know who was more frustrated, Addie or me. During our work in the office she made the deal with me that we would go to the park when we finished in the office.

In a freak deal, when I was looking for different network cable with RJ45 cable ends, I opened my carrying case for my old laptop. What should I find in there but the missing passports and birth certificates. Five weeks and three hundred thirty dollars too late! This case had probably not been opened since December of 2006, although it did make our last out of country trip.

After I took the rogue passports and certificates to Meme, Addison and I returned to the office to make one last attempt to connect another computer to the internet. While we we in the office, the doorbell rang. "Who is that Dandy?", Addison asked. "I'll bet you $5 that it is your mother", I replied. Don't ask me, I just had a feeling.

Sure enough when I opened the door, there was Makai with an Abilene Police Officer. For a very brief moment I was hoping she had a new boy friend although I knew a leap to the law enforcement side would be a huge jump from the law breaker side. Hey, I can hope can't I. It would be a definite improvement. After that brief moment of hope, I knew that Makai was here to pick up Addison.

I opened the door, and Addison went to hug the female that gave birth to her (I won't call her Addie's Mom because she doesn't qualify as a mother). "I'm here to pick up Addison", she said. You have to know Makai, but Makai is a drama queen. Her whole world turns around her. No one has ever gone through what she has, or had it as bad. It is really very sad. The policeman was a prop. I am sure this is all too common for Addison. Thing is I didn't and wouldn't make a scene because of Addison, and on top of that, my attorney and I had talked about this particular scenario playing out. Makai wanted to come in the house to get Addison's things, but I told her no, we would gather her things and I asked the officer to escort her off our property and back to the street. Scott tried to get out of the car but the officer put him back in it in quick order. Makai told me it was hard not having Addison. I'm sure the first of the month approaching and child support on its way made Makai feel guilty. You can bet it isn't about Addison. I asked Makai if this was for the weekend or was she bailing on the Sylvan program. Makai told me she is being pulled in all directions. Her mother, Doug, Garry, Birdie, they all wanted her to get Addison. I told Makai I could not believe she would deny Addison the opportunity to catch up at Sylvan. She told me that we mis-represented our offer, it was only supposed to be for three weeks. Duh, when we picked Addison up we had no idea what the testing would reveal. We had told everyone that this was an open ended offer, for as long as it took or for as long as Sylvan was beneficial.

I guess it is to bad we couldn't get Addison a "catch up vaccination".

While Addie, Meme and I packed her up, we talked about Sylvan. Addison is very disappointed about not getting to go. It is a shame. The pre-paid tuition is not transferable between Sylvan centers because they are independently owned franchises.

Makai's whole life is just a series of bailing out. I don't know that she has ever seen anything to the end. Most parents want their children to have it better than they did. Obviously Makai does not. Makai began telling me how we don't have a relationship (she and I), and how I only have a relationship with one child out of the three. I asked her which child that would be and she said Trc. Excuse me, but if you include Trc, that would be out of the four children. Kind of like her three week visit for Addison was only eighteen days.

I told Makai how disappointed I was, that this is one more bad decision in a life filled with bad decisions. I can think back to the one year she lived with Krl and I, and a talk I had with Makai about values and morals and how people from different social, economic backgrounds have different values and morals and how you can help someone up, but more times than not, they drag you down. She has made poor life decisions, with men and money.

Makai told me how I hadn't been there for her. Excuse me, but I refuse to enable her in her bad decisions. Of course I feel that she is probably referring to giving her monetary aid. I learned early on from making apartment deposits and buying garage sale stuff for her and Garry, that they never honored an obligation. When they were struggling so hard, I got both of them on at the family business. When she lost her job due to downsizing, we had her come to Abilene to stay with us as she searched for a job, and Krl kept Addison. Later, Garry quit the family business to go to work for a competitor for less money.

I'll never forget when she became pregnant and she ran off to live with Garry's family on the base and she tried to steal Krl's car. We should have filed on her then.

Addison is the only good thing Makai has ever done, and since Addison's birth her mother has tried to bring her down.

Makai has made a conscious decision that she wants to be white trash. This just proves the old adage that you can't wrestle a pig without getting it on you. When you are a twenty-eight year old mother of a nine year old, you don't parade around with hickeys. You don't parade around your "live in" in front of your child, you don't actively shop for another boy friend while your current one is in the joint because his parole was revoked. You don't let "your live in" walk naked around the house in front of your child and her friend. If there is a court order preventing him from seeing his kids you can bet there is a good reason. (I just hope the July Tom Green Grand jury is presented this case).

I have made the decision that Addison would be better off in foster care or any where, than she is with her mother. So that being said, I am going to devote all my efforts to breaking Makai financially, mentally and emotionally. If she wants to live like a street walker slut, she can live on the street. I'll be very surprised if she and Scott both don't end up in the joint. She is under investigation for bankruptcy fraud, and he is probably going to be indicted for indecency with a child, multiple counts.

I am not giving up on Addison. I think she is rescue-able, but she needs to be out of where she is at, quickly.

When Addison was in their car, I went back into the house. This was not a pleasant occurence. After a short while, the doorbell rang. I went to the door and it was Officer Farmer, the policeman. He thanked me for the way I handled the situation and asked me about Makai and Scott. He told me he didn't like Scott at all and he was looking for some reason to lock him up. He said Scott was a smart alec, and he had just hoped he would do something stupid because he wouldn't have filed a misdemeanor, he would have filed felony charges. Officer Farmer continued, telling me that he couldn't believe Makai would deny her child an opportunity like we were offering her. He wanted a little information about them for his report, and he was putting their license plate number and car description on a watch list should it enter Abilene again. He also told me if they showed back up, to not interact with them, just call the PD.

I had a day!

FATHER, strike down the infidels. Watch over and keep Addison. Help us to find the best solution to her situation.

Just when you think you have worked up a program to satisfy everyone, someone or some people decide to do their own thing.

After meeting with an attorney Thursday, he had advised me to have Makai contact her attorney to ask for a modification of the court order. This particular modification would not have compromised her "custody" of Addison, nor would it have affected Makai receiving child support. It would have given us (meaning Meme and Dandy) a legal position to have Addison in our home and pursue help for her from Sylvan. It would also have made the "catch up" educational efforts a priority. For everyone. It would mean that her school schedule would take precedence over any visitation.

I received a call from Scott (Makai's live in. I don't think they will ever marry because she has learned how to work the system and there are too many benefits to being a single mother) he was wanting to know if Addison's dad was giving us problems. I told him it was telephone calls and threats currently. Threats to pick her up regardless of her school schedule and threats to bring the police in if we deny him his visitation rights in the old divorce order.

I can deal with Addison's dad. If he shows up at our home and wants to pick up Addison, he will be welcome to follow me to San Angelo to pick her up from her mother. This won't ever happen because he asked the other day if we were going to give him gas money to take Addison to Sylvan if he has her on a school day.

When I finished talking with Scott, he put Makai on the phone. She told me she had all the papers ready to fax to us. I asked her if her attorney had any problem getting the modification and she told me the her attorney was with West Texas Legal Aid and while they will assist in divorce proceedings, they will not get involved in matters involving children in situations similar to what we have with Addison.

I asked Makai what she was going to fax and she told me "The court order from the divorce". Duh! What part of modification does she not understand. Of course she contends that she didn't learn of this until right before five Friday afternoon (she had nothing to do all day). All she had to do was ask for a referral, call us and we would have made financial arrangements with the lawyer she was referred to.

We called Makai's mother and step dad to ask them to stress the importance of what we were trying to do and they said they would talk with her.

In a short while Makai's step dad called back telling us that they didn't want to do anything that involved lawyers.

Here is a warning. Get ready!

I have started the wheels rolling already. Thanks to a good friend who has supplied me with legal advice in the past, he has agreed to hook me up with an attorney in San Angelo.

What I have to decided between now and Monday is exactly what I want to pursue. I could do the order modification I had asked Makai to do, or the attorney could go to the court and pursue custody of Addison, or I could seek an alliance with Addison's Dad and petition the court for the modification at his request (I figure if I make the deal to ask that his child support order be vacated, he would jump at the chance). Another attractive possibility is to request child support from Addison's mother. That might be poetic justice, at least in principle.

For everyone to have been "so on board" in the beginning, the last few days have seen a mutiny on a grand scale. That makes me think there were several who either looked at this a brief break from parenting (or grand parenting, or babysitting), but I don't think they believed Addison would stay.

Wrong! Addison is a s happy as a pea in a pod.

Last night Addison knew something was going on because I was talking with her mother and her San Angelo grandparents. She came and sat in my lap and asked me, "Dandy, am I not going to get to go to school tomorrow?" I told her, "Yes, you are." She grinned and laid her head down and we rocked for a while.

Addison was really excited because I had an e-mail from Sylvan and when I completed a survey, I received a certificate for five tokens for her to use at the reward store at Sylvan. Before she even goes in today she has 12 tokens!

I feel sorry for Addison. She wants the help, but there are so many people with their own agendas. When Addison and I talk, she has asked how long Sylvan will last. I told her as long as she wants to go to Sylvan or as long as it benefits her. I told her it could be for the summer, six months, one year, or I even told her she could stay until she graduates or gets married.

We are not doing this because it is easy, it isn't. It is quite an adjustment having a child in the house after ten years. We find ourselves thrown back into scheduling and figuring out driving schedules. But, it will be worth it when Sylvan catches Addison up.

At one point I thought about paying for Sylvan in San Angelo, but I think if whoever is responsible for taking her to and from school has nothing at risk (meaning no investment) they could be very lax in getting her there. (I guarantee you if it is costing a hundred dollars a day I will see that she is there unless she is extremely ill!).

We had to sign a contract with Sylvan. There are certain procedures and time tables for notifying them if Addison is unable to make her scheduled sessions. If it is excused, she has a certain window to make up that time. If it is unexcused, we still have to pay for it. To leave the program requires thirty days written notice.

Obviously no one in San Angelo has checked into all this, or they would be better informed.

So, I've given you a lot of information that brings me to this declaration:

Let the games begin, and may the party with the best attorney win!

Have a day.

FATHER, help and guide us as we sort through all the options. Help us to keep Addison's future and her well being at the forefront of our actions. FATHER she is a precious little girl, and has tremendous potential. Thank YOU for her, and we ask YOUR blessings on her.

I am ready for this week to be over.

Tomorrow I get to sleep late. Addison doesn't have to be at Sylvan until 9:30.

My Thursday was king of crazy. Steel supply, then parts store, attorney, part store, K.O.'s shop at Anson, and then home last night.

The most important stop I made was the attorney. Addison's Dad (I won't call him her father because he has never been one) has begun persistently calling our house. He has been very rude and abusive to Krl, threatening to bring the police to the house. He has told Krl and Addison that he doesn't care if she is going to school, he is coming over to get her for the day, whenever he feels like it.

The attorney advised me to have Makai call her attorney and ask them to file a motion for modification of the court order concerning primary domicile, and paternal visitation. He said that since we are acting in the best interest of Addison, it should be in the order that it is a priority. If I understand it correctly, Makai would still be the custodial parent, but we would have the court's permission for her to stay with us and attend Sylvan without any interference.

Krl was telling me that she and Addison have had a wonderful week. She has decided that Addison WANTS definite structure and Addison wants to learn different things. Last night with her Meme's help, Addison cooked hamburger helper! She was so proud! She is getting to be a pro at making her bed and probably the most surprising thing is she has not been in the pool for two days! Her choice!

It is really fun to sit and watch her discover more and more about herself. In a really neat moment last night, we were sitting at the supper table, it was my turn to ask the blessing and somewhere during the prayer I lost control of the praying and Krl began interjecting other names of people, then Addison began adding names, her Mom, Scott, Nonnie, and Poppy. It was neat!

Rian called and told me his job situation had a new twist. A man who Rian had worked with before, and who Rian also attends church with, called and told Rian he was going to have an opening for an assistant principal. He asked Rian if he would join his team and offered him $21,000 more than LSC is offering for him to be the building Principal. Wow!

The biggest problem for Rian is he has to opt out of his contract Monday, and he would sure want to have an offer, or preferably a contract in hand, before he tears up his Frenship contract.

Rian, Erica and Reid, along with two other couples and two smaller children are headed to Lake Alan Henry today. Taking a big pontoon boat along with a smaller ski boat. What do you want to bet someone gets sunburned! If Rian doesn't take his cell phone, I bet he has a lot of missed calls and messages when he returns!

Last night when I was at K.O.'s shop, he needed a little help firing his alcohol injected, blown, big block Chevrolet. At one yesterday afternoon, he had the bottom end built, but had to put the heads, intake, blower, injection hat, headers and magneto to finish the engine out. It took us a little while to get the timing where it would fire, then he put the timing light on it to dial it in. He was going by the original engine builders last night to let him check it out and determine what fuel "pill" they are going to run at Taylor. Last time out, they were on the verge of running the new motor too lean. In announcer terms, Lean is mean, but........... lean is expensive.

After we fired the big engine, we off loaded the load of steel I had on a trailer for "the project" reconstruction. K.O. and I both are hoping that they have a good weekend down there and don't break anything, because our schedules are filled.

K.O. was hoping to leave Abilene about 10:30 last night, meet up with another guy and drive on down to Taylor during the night. That should have put them in there about three or four this morning. Sunday they are driving back to Dublin, leaving the big truck and going to a reception for some newly weds in Glen Rose, then they will return, pick up the transmission and transfer case we purchased from a guy down there, then they will point their little caravan toward home.

And this is supposed to be fun?

Well, I hope you have a day.

FATHER, YOU are good! Thank YOU.

Wow! People are coming out of the woodwork since we began trying to do something to help Addison! And most of them are idiots!

Krl had a talk with Addie's "Grammie". I think they have an understanding now. I sure hope so.

Then in a surprise. Addison's Dad called. He is such and idiot. Krl said he was very abusive toward her, making threats and the likes. He is not the custodial parent. When he has Addison he refuses to give her any of her medications. And more frequently than not, he tells her he doesn't want to be her father any more.

He told Krl and Addison yesterday that he will be at the house Monday morning to pick Addison up for the day. He was informed that Monday she has Sylvan school and he said he didn't care. Addison asked him if he was going to pay for the missed sessions. (That's my girl showing a little spit and vinegar!) Finally she got so tired of his baloney, she hung up on him.

Currently I have a call in to an attorney. I want to know what our options are. I would think a restraining order might be in order. More for Addison's Dad's protection than ours (should I ever see him again). I don't want to get in the middle of the deal and him come swaggering in trying to sabotage it.

I know I can take the swagger out of him, but I would rather not deal with him at all.

Yesterday I worked at the parts store. For the first time this summer the day moved swiftly by.
Before I knew it it was five-thirty and I got rounded up and left for home.

Outside of the telephone, Krl and Addison had a good day. I had told Addie not to wake Krl up before 8:30. Krl said at 8:30 Addie went into the bedroom and told her, "Meme it is 8:30, but I'm going to let you sleep a little more".

Oh well, she had good intentions.

Addie quizzed Meme about what they were going to do. Meme replied, "Laundry, and clean house".

"Meme, will you teach me how to do laundry?", asked Addison.

Huh?

Krl said they did laundry and cleaned most of the day and when it came to supper
Addison wanted to help too. Our menu called for "Colossal Cheeseburger". Addie had a lot of fun helping Meme, and her Dandy got to go in there and put the smiley face on it.

Of course it was a hit because everyone helped make it.

When we sat down at the table to eat, Addie even volunteered to say the prayer! She did good.

I had almost forgotten what it is like to have a kiddo in the house.

The last two nights Addison has almost gone to sleep at the supper table.

Rian went for his interview at LCS yesterday. He is supposed to be crunching numbers to see what he would have to have. Of course LCS being a private school, he would lose his state retirement program and have to begin a 401K or some other type of retirement program. It sounds like the Superintendent is pretty above board. He asked Rian what he makes at Frenship and when Rian told him, the super replied, "I don't even make that much at LCS as Superintendent".

I don't know, that is a hard decision. If the Superintendent doesn't make as much as an assistant Principal, it would mean a tremendous difference in pay between a full Principal in public schools and a full Principal in a private school.

Rian says it would be a good group of kids to work with. No problem kids. I don't know, I think the problems might be of a different nature. One of his "wants" is free tuition for the three boys. Their standard proposal is fifty percent discount and an additional ten percent for every two years you are there.

Another plus is no TAKS.

I think that private schools have their very own test.

Well have a day.

FATHER, thank YOU for small steps of progress. Guide and direct us.

I woke this morning, thankful that the phone didn't ring early this morning.

One year ago today, the phone rang and it was Pat. She was telling me TJ had died. Once again, I can't believe it has been a year.

And the one year anniversary of her death makes me not too much in the mood to post.

Have a day!

Father, thank YOU for TJ, for her children, and for the memories that live beyond her brief time here.

What a week of emotion!

I worked on the project again this morning. Actually I didn't do much work on it, I cleaned on the shop where the work takes place. The project was pulled about sixty yards down the hill from the shop. And it has a big target on it!

I drove in at noon, took a quick bath and loaded up Miss Maddie Merlene to go to Sylvan. Heh, I think Addie gets tickled with what name I am going to call her next! Krl has had a bout with a migraine, so I told her to stay at home until we needed to return to Sylvan for our conference. When Addison and I arrived, we barely sat down until the little girl came from in the back. She was ready for Addison. Today, the subject was math. I was instructed to return in one and one-half hours.

I drove back home and began doing some "project home work". Actually I was shopping around for steel square tubing. It is unbelievable how much difference in pricing there is. I was looking for 120 feet of 3" square tubing, in either 3/16 thick wall or 1/4 thick wall. There was $700 difference from the cheapest to the most expensive!

I woke Krl so she would have time to freshen up from her power nap, then we started driving to Sylvan. We were sitting at Southwest Drive waiting for the light when my cell phone toned. It was Sylvan telling me Addison was already through! We picked her up and we were instructed to return in an hour and a half to go over her testing. They preferred that Addison not accompany us back.

We made a call, and Addison was gathering her swim gear so she could go to the swim club with Kathryn while we made our meeting.

We returned for our conference. Mike, the owner of the local Sylvan asked us to tell him about Addison. Krl and I took turns giving him insight. Finally he told us, "We do not test intelligence here. No IQ tests, nothing close. What we test is academia. But usually if there is an intellectual problem with learning, it will reveal itself." He went on to say, "Addison is not stupid. In fact she is very smart." He began unveiling the test results, and told us, "Addison has mastered her learning from kindergarten. Where the problem surfaces is during her first grade year. Her teacher did a poor job of teaching Addison phonics. That problem should have been "noticed" by the second grade teacher and then again by her third grade teacher, or at least her counselor. what has happened is without those foundation blocks to build on, Addison has had to memorize, to compensate."

Mike went on to tell us that the math problems are reading related. Fix the reading, and it will help the math. So we are concentrating on the reading during the first two months.

Currently, Krl and I are trying to determine the best payment plan. We can do weekly at $270/wk, or monthly at $1080/mo. or we can pre-pay a block of hours at a discounted rate. We can do 60 hours for $2600.00 or we can do 90 hours for $3600.00. The saving is about $103 on 60 hours or $812 on 90 hours. My math tells me to sign up for the big block. Mike tried to reassure us about our investment for the long term.

We are not investing in Sylvan. We are investing in Addison. And that is priceless!

Addison liked the reading yesterday a lot more than she did the math today. I think the girls who tested her had a lot to do with it!

When I went to the "project" this morning, I was very frustrated. Frustrated that the latest problem was not in any way the fault of the project, it was a freak accident. Yet that doesn't help with the frustration. all the sudden we are in the early stages of a major rebuild. K. O. didn't pick up on my mood and before it was all over, I released him from any commitment to allow him to pursue an alliance with HWH. Maybe it will be HWHO. At least he will be able to sidle up to his buddie Mark! I told him I would rather drag all the pieces back to Pepa's barn than fix it!

About 4 this afternoon, he was calling trying to see what was going on. He told me I left him high and dry. I told him I didn't see how a release was leaving him high and dry. I told him I would return his call when we got out of our meeting.

Long story short, I told him I wanted out of any agreements regarding the project appearing or my announcing.

We did finally talk. I went out there again for about an hour and I drew and diagrammed all over the shop floor with chalk. Overhead, side, and rear view. I think I finally got my idea across.

When I came home tonight, I picked up supper on the way. When I arrived home Trc and Kat were just dropping off Addie. What a bonus for Addison! Two days in a row she got to spend time with Kat. A quick secret, Addie's teacher today said Addie didn't spend any tokens today, she is saving them to buy something for Kathryn.

After supper tonight, I was cleaning the table and the kitchen. Krl had gone to tuck Addison in, and as I made my way to my chair, I glanced in Addison's room and saw Meme and her both kneeling at the side of the bed saying Addie's prayers.

Priceless!

I hope this is a well rounded, high impact, stay.

One other quick note. Rian went in and signed his new contract yesterday. Two years. Last night, while he was at vacation Bible school at Greenlawn, he had a visitor stop by asking him if there was an opening at Lubbock Christian Schools for a High School Principal, would he be interested. He told the man, who is the Superintendent of Lubbock Christian Schools, that he would, but he only has seven day left to opt out of his contract. This morning the Superintendent called and told Rian that there WAS indeed an opening for the high school Principal's position. Now Rian has to go through the application, interview process quickly if he hopes to make the move.

Lots going on!

Hope YOU had a day!

FATHER, thank YOU for Addison's testing showing her weaknesses and that they can be addressed and corrected. We pray that her zeal will grow as she begins her course of study. Thank YOU for special moments between her and her Meme. Thank YOU for her special relationship with Kat. Renew and refresh us all.

A wild and wooly weekend!

We worked on the project. By the way, we went with GREEN. Nothing runs like a Deere! I had to leave for the family reunion, but after we made the decision, the guys got busy. By night fall the John Deere engine was sitting in the floor of the shop. Some of it is so simple, it is going to be a blessing, while other aspects are going to be a challenge.

This morning I made a deal for a transmission and transfer case. Heh, heh, I think I got a pretty good deal. Clint, a puller friend from Dublin brokered the deal. In exchange, I gave Clint the steer axle from the machine we are scraping.

The family reunion went well. The auction was a little off, $1700+ , and the raffle brought in another five or six hundred while ringo brought in $112. Ended up, just about break even which means the fund still has a good start on next year!

Rian came in almost directly from summer church camp and spoke at church Sunday morning. He spoke on identity. Who are you? It was pretty good. Jake led singing after we had a special music presentation by Nikki Heath. Everything she sang, she wrote. I just get the feeling that Nikki went easy on us because I think if she cut loose, she would have blown us out of the house.

When we got home Sunday afternoon, I began working with a radio spot Ollie had dropped off. It is for a former employer of hers and she didn't like it and wanted me to re-do it. To be honest, and I was, I didn't think it was that bad. Ollie and Brad stopped by to retrieve it late Sunday afternoon.

While Ollie was here, Addison drew and colored a picture for her mother. After Ollie left, Addie got really pouty, before throwing a deluxe fit! Next time I see her get pouty I think I will just put her out of the house.

Her fit reminded me of her mother. She was mad all over. She didn't want to be here, she wanted to go home, she hated it here, she hated Meme, and she hated Dandy. The straw that broke the camels back was when she hit Meme and kicked Dandy.

Dandy got his belt. Belt, meet Addison. She definitely didn't like that. But if there are any more fits, I promise there will be more belt.

She wanted to call her mother, while we tried we couldn't get hold of her initially. We tried her Nonnie. Poppy was a little smart, telling Krl, "I thought ya'll wanted her there". That comes from an ex-educator. Duh, if the student doesn't want to be here what are the odds of our efforts being successful!

Nonnie and Auntie "M" tell Krl and I that this is Addison's bi-polar problem. I think hogwash! The is a rotten brat that is used to getting her way.

When we finally talked to Addison's mother she wanted to talk to Addison and agreed to come and get her. Huh! Part of the plan was for plenty of support for Addison staying here.

After a couple of hours of slamming doors, screaming and crying I sent Addison to her room. I began to think about what it was going to take to get her calmed down. Finally I came up with an idea.

Addison has become very attached to Miss Maple Syrple, my dog. In fact I have been letting Miss Maple sleep with Addie. Maple didn't like all the hubbub going on so I gathered her up and went into Addison's room and told Addie that she had upset Maple Syrple and she needed to calm her down. She took her and sat down on the day bed and began stroking and petting Maple. In a short while she and Maple came out of her room. Addison came to me and I gathered her up, not saying anything. I just put Addie in my lap and rocked her for about an hour. We gave her her night-time medication, and she ate a hamburger I had been trying to grill in the middle of all of this.

When I had an opportunity I went outside and called Addison's mother to tell her NOT to come to pick up Addie.

Addison's mother and her Auntie "M" say she doesn't remember when she acts badly. Bunk!

This morning Addison and I were up before Krl. I helped her with her cereal and milk and we were talking. I asked her if she was in a better mood today than she was last evening. I can tell by her actions that she remembers every detail.

We are going to cut off outside interference, from everyone, non-essential to this project. At present her worst enemy is her "Grammie" in Houston. It may hack her off but if she can't take a hint I can be blunt.

Today Krl and I both felt like our insides were made of jello! And I hate jello!

We made the 1pm. appointment at Sylvan. There was a lot of paperwork for Krl and I to fill out and Johanna, the sweet woman from Sylvan, took Addison back to begin working. When we finished we were told to go get a glass of tea or cup of coffee, that today's testing would take two hours.

Obviously, Johanna didn't know what kind of evening we had Sunday night or she would have suggest a much stouter refreshment!

When we returned at 3 pm. we waited for about fifteen minutes for them to complete their work. When they came out of the back we could see them at the reward store as Johanna let Addie pick her reward for the day!

Johanna told us that Addison worked really hard today. All we could get from Addison was that it was really fun!

We go back tomorrow for two more hours of testing.

Kathryn finally got to come over this afternoon. She and Addie got Ocean water and powerade slushes before putting their suits on and hitting the pool. They seem to have had a really good time.

Addison was shocked to find that she is a half head shorter than Kathryn!

If I heard correctly, Kathryn only has one more day this week that she has softball practice.

I did make the deal with Addison that she could go to San Angelo to play on the weekends, but she is going to work in Abilene Monday through Thursday!

Rian called me this morning to tell me of their morning. He thought they had it bad until I told him about our evening, but I have to admit, their morning is probably just one of many, many, they have to look forward to.

Rian said that Holt had Reid's "T-ball" trophy. When Reid saw this he told Holt, "That's mine!"

Holt responded by throwing it on the kitchen floor, shattering it into many pieces. Reid reciprocated by hitting Holt, and Holt countered by stabbing Reid in the cheek with a fork!

I bet Rian and Erica can't wait until the third one can enter the fray!

All I got to say about that is ............ insurance ...... and plenty of it!

For the record, I finally sent the bid package on the South Texas work. I argued with myself. I don't know if I am ready for it, but in the end I know that any other year I would kick myself for not attempting to get the work. I think the numbers I submitted are very real. We will see if they are good enough.

Hope you had a day!

FATHER, you test us. I hope we passed last evening. Maybe we are rusty from having a child in our home. Instill in us the energy and patience we need to deal with this effort.

Committed. We are officially committed. I had spent three brief, three hour stints working on K.O.'s and my project. I had unhooked lighting, I had removed storage and tool boxes. I had removed the radiator, extra fans, unhooked throttle and transmission linkages.

This morning, we removed the small block Chevrolet, complete with turbo 400 automatic transmission.

Now, we either fix it or paint it brown!

We have two donor candidates. A John Deere 484, and an International 1400. Both have diesel engines, both have hydrostatic transmissions. We pulled the two donors side by side and began an evaluation. I would draw a + or a - on each one marking a head to head comparison. Finally we got to the point that we had to stop for the day.

Our lead fabricator is coming in tonight. He is very gifted in looking over everything and making a recommendation. Three of us spent the day with the project, but we all await his input. We have cast our votes, yet everyone stipulated that they reserved the right to change their vote after hearing this man's reasoning.

And I am spent.

The three of us that spent the day with the project went to Anson to grab a bite of lunch. K.O. ordered a BLT. After he had ordered we reminded him of the food poisoning which has been related to tomatoes. We didn't see our waitress until she delivered his food. He was relieved to find that she brought him a BL no T.

Would that be false advertising in their menu?

I have found that since my surgery, infection, medication and continuing recovery, I have an insatiable thirst. Today I bet I drank three glasses of tea to every glass my two counterparts drank. Of course it didn't hurt it was excellent tea! I kept K.O. hopping to find another tea pitcher!

I am spent. Today was the first day I have spent, "in the heat", all day. I can tell, I'm not me.

This weekend is the family reunion at the Howard Johnson's. I drove by today and was appalled at the condition of the exterior of the facility. It is grown up and in need of some "grooming". I know they have had some problems with personnel. They had a lead employee killed in an auto accident a few months ago and they have not lived up to expectations since. When Memama booked the date they assured her their pool would be ready and they would have restaurants up and going. Recently they revised their contracts to allow outside caterers to come in for the reunion.

I noticed that one of the new hotels being built by Albertson's appears to have two large meeting or reunion rooms! I sure hope so!

I am going to work in the morning at K.O.'s shop. I've gotta hear what the fabricator has to say. About two thirty or three I will come home, shower and go to the reunion and conduct the annual auction. There are activities and a meal provided by the reunion fund Saturday night. Sunday will be church service and a noon meal, separated by the annual business meeting.

Monday it is back to the project in the morning and to Sylvan with Krl and Addison at 1:00pm. Tuesday may be the same thing.

Hope you had a day!

FATHER, refresh and renew me. I am tired, I am weak, I am worn down. I pray for safe travel for all the family members traveling to our reunion. I pray for safe travel for Rian, his family, and all their campers, as they travel home tomorrow.

I usually don't get caught up in the many talent contests of modern day reality television. I stress that word usually!

For two weeks I have watched Nashville Star, pulling for Coffey Anderson from Bangs, Texas. Big Country ties! Coffey is a single Dad and competed on American Idol a couple of years ago. I don't know how far Coffey will go because there are some SERIOUS acts he is competing with. But, we can hope!

Last night I watched America's Got Talent. Many, many people, trying to make their mark. However for the most part, they were bad. Now I'm not saying I can do better, I am no "Mike Cope sings the classics!"

However, two acts last night were sensational. The first was a four year old named Kaitlyn Maher. Cute as she can be, and she did a super job of singing. I loved it when they asked her if she was from New York and she told them she was from America!

In my opinion, the other act stole the show. Neil Boyd, a rotund insurance salesman from Missouri, sang an opera ballad and he sang the lights out! O-U-T. OUT! He grew up with his brother and Mom and when asked what it would mean if he won America's Got Talent he replied, "It would mean everything!" By the end of his performance the entire crowd was on their feet, along with the judges, giving him a standing ovation. I swear, he made the hair stand up on the back of my neck! He was absolutely fabulous! He was so moved, by all the emotion of his song, the crowd and the judges, he was in tears!

I cannot wait!

You can go to the official website for America's Got Talent and watch their audition clips. It is well worth the time and trouble.

No doubt. From everything I have seen from all the competitions. America does have talent.

I am scheming tonight. Last night I was the last one to go to bed and I had very little bed awaiting me. Tonight I intend to be first!

One more day to my parts store work week. I think I just might make it!

I hope you had a day!

FATHER, thank YOU for all the talented people who share their talents with others.

It was an eventful evening at our house last evening.

Addison was wound so tightly I thought her mainspring would sprung! About ten-thirty we decided it was time for bed. She decided she wanted to sleep with Mema and Dandy. We were lying in the dark and she was a "Chatty Cathy". When I encouraged her to zip it, we began making multiple trips to the bathroom. Finally she wanted to turn the television on. Enough was enough and she and Meme got up. Krl said it was about three before Addie was down for the count.

When I left this morning, not a creature was stirring! Not even a pup! They aren't used to that!

I went into the parts store today. I didn't know how long I would stay, but I stayed until after five. Then Krl needed me to go by the store. By the time I got home, I was worn flat dab out.

But, I am getting better. Most of my day was trying to determine some problems with pricing profiles. For some reason I could go the exact same route but use two different account numbers and I would get two completely different screens. The national support for the computer system had gone in a few weeks ago and changed all of our Master Installers to red sheet pricing. That meant that customer pricing went from preferred pricing to the highest available. For the last month they had been pricing on the fly!

Krl and Addie worked in and on the pool today, so I guess it is officially open. Krl needs to turn her auto-vac loose on it. Tomorrow should be a good day to put a little clarifier. PH is probably a little whackie too. Oh well, give me some time! We'll get there!

Hope you had a day!

FATHER, I pray for strength, I pray for resolve. Renew me.

We just returned home with our guest.

We are very excited and she is too. She has already made herself at home in her and Kathryn's room. She got her a bag of chips, a drink and wanted to sit back and watch a dvd.

Krl and I got tickled after we had left Nonnie's house Addison was thirsty and hungry so we stopped at McDonald's and she got a cheeseburger happy meal. I think she refilled her drink two or three times and went back and got another cheeseburger!

Our first step will be to take her in for testing. Then Sylvan will make their recommendation.

I do want to make a clarification. Addison's Nonnie and Poppy had been working with her, but sometimes "family" can't get the results an outsider can. Often times one can be played, taking advantages of "what works" to get their way. I think Addie is a lot smarter than she wants anyone to know!

A minute ago Addison went to Krl and gave her a hug and told her she was so happy. I know it was difficult for everyone when we drove off with her.

I went out to K.O.'s this morning and worked about three hours. Slowly but surely I am dismantling the operators platform of the project. Probably in the next session, which should be Friday, we may drop the engine and transmission. As luck would have it, K.O. is hoping to get done with his wheat cutting and has a few things to do prior to our attacking the project full fledged. Maybe he will be ready when I return to it! I know it is a slow process to build my stamina back up.

I sent Reid and Holt another letter today. One more tomorrow and that will probably do it as they return home Saturday.

This weekend is the Freeman-Stevens reunion. Once again it is being held in Abilene but will be at the Howard Johnson's instead of the Regency. This is our family's year to play host. Once again I have been asked to conduct the auction. I'm not sure but I had heard that they were considering playing Deal or No Deal. Once again I have opted out of the golf.

Speaking of golf, when we were waiting on Addison at her Nonnie's house, I got to see the final hole of the eighteen hole playoff and Tiger making a birdie to tie it up and force it to sudden death. Rocco seemed to have a case of nerves and hit into a sand trap from the tee and then onto a cart path with his second shot. Tiger showed his normal poise and birdied for the win.

Hope you had a day!

FATHER, thank YOU for the safe travel. Bless Addison. Bless our efforts.

Happy Birthday TJ!

She would have been 44 today.

Happy Father's Day, Dad!

We have absolutely nothing specific for our day. We'll just go with the flow!

Rian, Erica, Reid, Holt, and Drew left this morning headed to church camp in Sacramento, New Mexico. They will return next Saturday. I'm not sure how many campers are going but Rian said he and the other youth minister will be in the church's fifteen passenger van accompanied by a large bus. Reid and Holt were going to ride with Rian while Erica and Drew will ride with the other youth minister's wife in their personal vehicle.

For any of you who might want to send Reid and Holt some mail, their address is:

Reid and Holt Freeman
% Pine Springs Summer Camp
132 Spring Canyon Road
Sacramento, Nm. 88347

I can't think about them leaving for camp without thinking about the tragedy of nine years ago when the Greenlawn bus was sideswiped and six campers were killed. I'm sure it is also on the minds of the Greenlawn church members.

It is almost unbelievable, how readily we accept the risk of travel. We hardly acknowledge the dangers. It seems that we just drive more and more miles every year and you have to believe that with more miles there is more risk.

I can remember growing up when a trip fifty miles to Abilene was "once in blue moon". A trip to Sweetwater (eight miles) was once a week. Now many people commute greater distances.

I don't know about you, but with fuel prices what they are, I now find myself trying to combine trips, and making sure that the travel is necessary.

One thing that is adversely affecting me is that my little pickup is out of commission. Last September I was headed for the the parts store early one morning when it had a problem. I don't know exactly what it was, I haven't opened the engine up. But, I do know it is terminal. I think the aluminum head suffered major damage. I decided to replace the engine and just last month the replacement engine came in. It is sitting in the floor of Chris's shop in Roscoe. I am going to have to get it into my list of "things to do". There is considerable difference between fuel consumption when I compare my little fourteen year old pickup and my full size truck.

Yesterday I was on my way to K.O.'s and passed a popular convenience store. Gas was 3.889 and every single pump was in use, some lanes had cars waiting. Yikes!

I have been trying to work up a job bid for some trucking. I use a variable rate Fuel Surcharge that protects the trucker if fuel goes up, yet protects the shipper if fuel goes down. It has been a big project because first of all, the top end fuel on the old fuel price list was $4.009. That meant I had to extend the fuel pricing, with corresponding freight percentage increases for each step. Another factor that complicated this process was that the old fuel surcharge lists used base line fuel costs of $1.259. I don't know about you, but I doubt we will ever see that kind of pricing again. I have been working on a new baseline of $3.509. Long story short, it means that all the existing pricing was "out the window".

I did some quick figuring, just out of curiosity, on the seasonal jobsite fuel use and costs. An average bill for a week this past year was $23,000.00. With current pricing it would push it over $31,000. For a week!

I must be nutz!

Have a day!

FATHER, thank YOU for all the Dads, I ask a special blessing on them on their special day. I ask safe travel for Rian, his family and all their campers as they make their annual pilgrimage. I ask YOUR guidance as we make important decisions.

I made the trek to Roscoe late yesterday morning. I was meeting "the family" at the church as the women were feeding a meal prior to Uncle Douglas's funeral. I was barely late, and when I entered the fellowship hall, the serving lines were still back up. I had opportunity to visit with several cousins, Aunts and Uncles prior to going through the line.

One of the first I visited with was Jerry Lynn. He is Douglas and Anna Joyce's oldest son and resides in Albuquerque, Nm. As we spoke he told me that Douglas had his stroke eighteen years ago. He continued, "we were blessed with sixteen relatively good years, but the last two were very difficult for Daddy". He went on to say this was much better than the way we lost Freddy and Terri Jo. We weren't expecting them to die. We knew with Douglas it was just a matter of time. But that doesn't mean it is any easier to say goodbye.

I visited with Anna Joyce and she told me that everything was going to be all right. I know she is exhausted, yet she will be lost without Douglas to care for.

Nephews served as Pall Bearers and as Honorary Pall Bearers. I served in the latter capacity. I wasn't aware of that distinction until the funeral director came to me prior to seating the pall bearers.

In the course of the service, which was officiated by Royce Clay, he made mention that he has had the funeral wishes of Douglas and Anna Joyce locked in his safety deposit box for close to twelve years. Everything from songs to scripture were included. The service concluded at the grave site with the singing of 'till we meet again.

For a funeral it was a good one, if there is such a thing.

The family had a pretty good turn out, even though it was all too soon, in an all too familiar setting.

I usually don't do funerals, that is why I'm not going to have one of my own.

This morning I decided to go to K.O.'s shop to work on our project. Monday would be three weeks since I had been able to work on it. I did about three hours and felt like that was enough. I may try to do it again Monday. I'm sore from all the up and down climbing on it but we need to get busy. From the transit incident with the project prior to the Sweetwater show, we suffered a crack in the transmission housing. We had been threatening to replace the gas engine and turbo transmission with a diesel engine and hydrostatic drive. Now is as good a time as any. So we are going to make a major change over prior to the show in Fairfield in July. If any of you have any spare time or expertise with air clutches let me know! Fabricators welcome!

Krl and I had been talking about Addison's predicament. We decided we would offer to let her come and stay with us, for how ever long, three weeks, the rest of the summer, until she graduates or marries. We would enroll her at Sylvan at our expense to try to get her caught up and hopefully develop some better study habits. She is such a precious little girl and just needs some intensive one on one with her schooling.

After we had discussed it, we decided it was the least we could do. It has been ten years since we "shared" our home with a kiddo. But, if that is what it takes, that is what we are willing to do. When Krl first approached Addie's "Nonnie" the idea didn't seem to be received too well. However, Friday morning Addison called Krl and told her she would be ready Monday. So Monday afternoon, we will make the trek to San Angelo and pick her up. We will take her in for an assessment, but preliminary talks with Sylvan suggest it may take a year of tutoring to catch her up. She will attend two to three days per week for two hour long sessions, the schedule will alternate between mornings and afternoons and the days will not be scheduled consecutively. The people at Sylvan sure seem to know their stuff. The proof is in the pudding! Our biggest fear is that once we begin the program, Addison or her mother might want to abandon it. It is our intention to be in it for the long run.

Pray for us in our new endeavor. Pray for Addison.

Have a day!

FATHER we ask YOUR blessing on Addison, and on our endeavor to help her. We pray that things will come together for Addison physically, emotionally, spiritually, and intellectually. That our efforts would be fruitful!

Had a little problem with that last post. I had made some changes and deleted some stuff, but for some reason when it published the deleted part was put on the tail end. It gave the impression I was trying to determine how long it would take a letter to go from here (Abilene) to there (heaven)! When in actuality I was trying to determine how long it would take a letter to go from here (Abilene) to Sacramento, Nm. earlier in the post!

I hope GOD isn't looking for some mail!

Over the last few years, Krl and I have had opportunity to choose certain charities as targets for gifts from our former employer. Of course there have always been charities or organizations in close proximity to the seasonal work, St. Lawrence Catholic Church, the Glasscock County Livestock Show, The Todd Weishun Memorial Scholarship Fund, the local Volunteer Fire Department and the local Emergency Medical Service, just to mention a few.

However, we have chosen to include some others that are not so close by (especially when we are at the jobsite). One of Krl's favorites is St. Judes Children's Hospital and they have been by far the largest beneficiary of the small charitable budget we work with. Krl's short list continues with Rescue the Animals, and the Noah project.

My short list has been headed by the Cherokee Home for Children, and this year we did a matching gift with Rian's students through the Children's Miracle Network.

In some instances it has been a frustrating experience. We believe very strongly in supporting St. Judes, but after the initial gift, the company became bombarded with literature soliciting additional gifts. These publications have not been low end. They have been some of the very best print material you will ever see. Multi color, high gloss productions. Other promotional gifts include engraved plates, and personal notes from Marlo herself. Krl finally became so frustrated with the constant solicitation that she wrote Marlo, telling her that any benefit from the gift was being consumed by the print blitz for more! She went on to say that any future gift would be weighed against the amount of solicitation. Krl's and my theory is, the gift is not tied to the amount of solicitation, unless the wear us out in which our recommendation might be to make it smaller. Surprisingly, it would appear the solicitation has decreased.

My exposure to the Cherokee Children's Home goes back to college when one of my roommates was from Cherokee. They are celebrating fifty years of service to youth in need. Recently they had their annual celebration with ex-residents, house parents, employees, and benefactors in attendance. On this day they dedicated the Jesse Ratliff Smokehouse, which was a particular significance to me. That would be Uncle Jesse. I just thought it was kind of neat that we both saw the children's home to be a worthy recipient, although I feel sure Uncle Jesse's contributions would dwarf what we have given or been able to direct to them.

This has been a long way to get to the point, and in no way has this been any attempt to blow my horn, Krl's horn the our former employers horn.

I would encourage you to pick an organization or charity and give to them regularly. The size of the gift is not important. Many small gifts added together yield great numbers.

We have been blessed, and in whatever small way, want to share by blessing others.

Have a day.

FATHER, we continue to lift up Douglas's family for YOUR comfort. We pray that YOU would move anyone reading this to share their blessings with others.

I may be stretching it just a tad. I feel much better, but I may not be doing as well physically as I am mentally.

For about three weeks (since just before my surgery), I have been trying to get the big travel trailer moved from in front of our house to the storage facility, but with no results. The one remaining company truck is in Roscoe with no insurance on it, so I was trying to get KO or Pepa to get one of their trucks by for a thirty minute job.

Last night Pepa called and told me that Mario was going to be through Abilene today sometime, So, I spent part of my morning readying the big trailer. I had already rolled all the cords, raised all the stabilizers, and drained the water reservoir. So today, I put a few items back in the trailer and filled the water reservoir with fresh water, looked for some allergy medication for Krl, and last but not least, set off two "foggers".

Shortly before Mario arrived, I was in the house and Krl told me to sit down and rest, that I was "white as a sheet". After a brief respite, Mario called to tell me he was lost, just a short distance from our house. I gave him his bearings and as he began making his way toward the house I made my way outside. In just a handful of minutes he was hooked up and headed out. I picked up all the "scotch blocks", put them in my pickup and headed out. We arrived at the storage facility and in about fifteen minutes we had lowered the landing gear and unhooked the big trailer. I escorted Mario back to the security gate and coded him out, then I went back to finish storing the trailer.

By the time I was through, I was wasted. My energy level and stamina are almost non-existent.

As I drove into our driveway, I called Pepa to tell him I had paid Mario for helping me out. I appreciated the help, but not enough to let him double dip by collecting from me and turning in a manifest too!

I made it in the house and sat down in my chair with a big Diet Coke!

Shortly my phone rang and it was Memama. She wanted to know if Pepa had told me that Uncle Douglas had died in the early hours of today. He hadn't, so she gave me a brief idea of the itinerary. She is speculating that his funeral will be Friday. Jerry will be driving from Albuquerque, Jack from Amarillo, Donna from Lubbock, Danny from Lake Brownwood, and of course Mike is the only one who lives in Sweetwater. Memama said that Anna is doing very well considering.

Many years ago, Douglas suffered a stroke, and for the last few years he has required around the clock care. At one point he was admitted to a nursing home, but about a year and a half ago Anna took him home.

Before I did the trailer project I had been looking and reading on the internet. One of the search engine home page headlines read "What is next for Chelsea Clinton after the campaign trail?" I clicked on it and went to a video. Some newscasters were talking about the poise that the twenty-eight year old had exhibited on the campaign trail. They played a tape of a speech Chelsea made the day before her mother suspended her campaign. I was amazed with how much she sounded like Hillary! She told the reporters that she had a job (for a hedge fund in Manhattan), she had an apartment, and she had her yorkie dog. In short, she has a life outside of politics. Of course there is speculation that at some point she will mount a bid for a congressional seat.

When I went back into the living room where Krl was at, she asked me what Hillary was saying! Hah!

I've got a job for next week. Rian called and asked me to write Reid and Holt while they are at camp next week. Their family is accompanying the Greenlawn Youth to Sacramento, New Mexico. Rian said the boys always love to get any mail, but especially at camp!

Now I will try to determine how long it takes a letter to go from here to there!

Hope you had a day!

FATHER, I pray for Anna Joyce and her family, that YOU will comfort them in their loss. I ask for safe travel for those driving in for Douglas's service.

I have felt better today than I have in two weeks! Praise the LORD! I think I am going to live!

Krl and I finally broke down and went to the grocery store. It had been three weeks! We had been trying not to buy a bunch of stuff that was going to ruin while we were in Cozumel.

But...... since we didn't get to go, we were looking at eating the vinyl off the shelves in the pantry! O.K., it wasn't that bad. But we were having to be creative to plan a meal.

By the time we went to the store, returned and hauled it all into the house. I was a whipped puppy! I was about melted down! Still the monster antibiotic has an effect on me!

When we had everything inside, we took a break. I in my recliner, Krl in her glider rocker. On the television was Oprah.

We were blessed that GOD brought us to the point where we were. We got to view a very special Oprah show featuring Randy Pausch's final lecture. He is married, the father of three, a tenured professor at Carnegie Mellon University, and he has pancreatic cancer. He has been through surgery, chemo, and radiation but the cancer has returned. There is an academic tradition called the last lecture where if you knew you were dying, what would you tell your students. The big difference for Randy is this situation was not hypothetical. His lecture was intended for his three children to see someday, when they were older. Instead, it has been downloaded over a million times on the internet.

It is very moving. I don't know if I could have the outlook he has. It is worth doing the search and reading the final lecture or going to Oprah's and viewing it there.

One really impressive point was when someone asked him, "You have become famous because you are dying, isn't it going to be embarrassing if you live?" His response, was "Give me that problem!"

And we think we have it bad. I had been wishing the knot on my tricep had been on my bicep. I'd be buff!

FATHER, I pray for Randy Pausch, for his family. I am thankful for the tremendous impact he is having in his adversity. I pray for YOUR gifts of healing for him. Bless him and bless them in this ordeal.

Krl and I both are fighting the blues.

That was probably a poor choice of words because we should have left yesterday to drive to Dallas and flown out this morning to the beautiful blue waters of Cozumel.

But........... thanks to my problem incision, we remain in beautiful, scenic Abilene, Texas.

I have felt better today than I have felt in three weeks! Isn't that par for the course. Scrap the vacation plans and get better. Actually, I had a come to JESUS meeting this morning and was counting the gigantic 875mg antibiotics I still have to take. Much to my surprise, there were only two.

Huh? These were suppose to last until Thursday. I retrieved the bottle to see for sure what the count was supposed to be. Twenty. Directions read, take two daily, one morning and one at night until medication is gone. Hello! I graduated from Roscoe High, pardon my math!

No wonder I have felt like you know what on your shoe! Can you OD on antibiotics?

I spent part of my day working on fuel surcharges. I am working on some freight rates for a summer haul. I was actually supposed to do this last week, but my brain and my mind have been on different pages. Crazy thing is, this is an opportunity that I have hoped and prayed for in the past. And, most years, we would have been home long before May 1, and I would have been recharged by now, and been searching for an opportunity. This may be one of the toughest bid processes I have ever gone through because the "want to" is lacking .

I sat tonight watching our little family. Krl, myself, and the three houndgirls. All the kids are gone, so this is what we are. Krl made the comment that Prissy has been having a hard time missing Lady Rachel, Black Dog, Freeman. It has been almost a month since we lost her. Of course at sixteen, Prissy is the senior houndgirl of the house by thirteen years. Problem is, she is a standard poodle and can't jump up in your lap to get lovin'. Miss Maple Syrple (Brandy) has her arm of my chair. She takes very little encouragement to hop up there and get comfortable and beginning to snore! Phoo do (Phooey), wants to play both ends against the middle. She will sit in Krl's lap until mine looks more inviting. I have kidded that her name should have been "belly goat". She loves for me to kick my recliner back so she can lay on my belly! Of course she has to hop up there and do the cutest flop and roll until she is comfortable. If I will throw in a belly rub she will follow me anywhere!

Krl was having trouble getting warm tonight, so she and the houndgirls went in the back yard, but before long all three girls were back in the house. I watched as Krl surveyed the back yard. I knew that she was doing mental yard work, planting more flowers with appropriate landscaping. Of course she has been talking and working toward opening her pool. This may be a major undertaking as last year we didn't open it at all due to her broken leg!

Before Krl came back in, I took a tour with her through the back yard watching mental images of Sox, our yellow cat, The two Sadats, Duchess, Shadow, Lady Rachel, Lancelot, and Pee Wee as they had enjoyed playing back there. All of our pets of nineteen years that are no long with us. The only problem was I couldn't visualize Precious, our jet black cat, in the back yard because she was a house cat!

Aren't memories wonderful?

In a light moment this evening, Prissy went to the utility room to eat. In a few moments, she returned to the living room and deposited a mouthful of dog food on an area rug, to eat. I don't blame her, I don't like to eat alone either. Crazy thing is, this is something Lady Rachel taught all three of our remaining hounds. In fact we use to call her the chipmunk!

We have spent part of our evening watching Nashville Star. Go Coffey! He is a contestant with
Big Country ties! It is such a shame all of these people can't win.

I have been majorly impressed with the improvement from the auditions to tonight's elimination. It is unbelievable what the professionals can do with raw talent. I could agree with the two bottom end performers, but I think I would have sent Allyson home rather than Charley.

But, then what do I know.

You have no idea how thrilled I was to take my last "horse pill". I may be disappointed, but I really feel like I will feel better tomorrow.

Just a couple of quick notes. I talked with Jeanetta today and they have been spared so far from the flooding in Indiana. Billy has not been as fortunate. His just completed basement project has been a total loss. Luckily he had insurance.

And, Pat is home! Somebody get her keys and hide them! Two months in Pflugerville is enough!

So with that, have a night and a day tomorrow!

FATHER, thank YOU for your miracle of healing. I ask that you continue to work your gifts of healing on me! Abide in me!

I was told by a friend of mine who lost a son, that you never get over it. If you are fortunate, you learn to live with it.

Sometimes people in their attempts to console family members will say that time heals all pain.

I personally don't think that time will ever fill the void left by losing a family member, or the pain of it.

In fact, I don't want to heal if it means forgetting. There are a lifetime of memories, each one as precious as another.

I am beginning to understand what my friend means.

Our family is very blessed to have a strong network of friends. Last year when Freddy died, Pat, Krl and myself were all in Abilene. Immediately we were concerned about "support" for family. We made provisions for my early release from the medical facility and began making a feverish trek westward to Roscoe. When we arrived at our parents, we were relieved to walk in to a house filled with friends and a constant flow of people bringing supplies and food. I am sure that I will probably forget someone but as my recollection serves, there were Marsha and Tonya in the kitchen, Ronnie and Ramona in the living room, Joe Brad floating about seeing to everyones needs. These people were the first responders, arriving within a brief time of the news spreading through the community. Throughout the day, a steady stream of well wishers and concerned friends flowed in and out of the house.

You friends will never know how much we appreciate you! Thanks!

After much deliberation, my trip to Cozumel is off. Thursday I went to see the surgeon and he wasn't overly concerned. He said he saw no problem in going, that either I could go as I was or he could open up the problem incision, clean it out and pack it and I could still go. The biggest problem would be the need of sterile saline solution for washing and flushing the wound before repacking and bandaging daily.

I don't know about you but I have no desire to go to Mexico and have a problem and have to deal with a doctor down there.

I told the surgeon that I felt "really" poor. He told me it wasn't the incision site, it was the antibiotic and the large dosage I am on that is making me feel bad. He said the antibiotic is some pretty nasty stuff!

When I arrived back home, I got to thinking about what I was doing going to a resort island when my medication cautions against being in direct sunlight. I did some calculations and Thursday would be my first med free day while I was there so I see no need in going, especially when I factored in the pain and discomfort.

I told Krl that she could go because she was responsible for talking her brother and his wife in to going. Luckily for us, we took out the insurance just in case we couldn't go. (You just never know when you book a trip six months in advance). Unfortunately, they didn't.

Rian, Erica and the boys are at Pat and Hag's lake place this weekend. Rian has been battling with himself, he is so tired of school. Since the conclusion of the school year and the mass exodus of all the teachers, his schedule has been filled with workshops and paperwork. I am sure it is no consolation that all the people that are there are he and his supervisory principal along with their secretaries and the janitorial staff. Of course he has one week left to fulfill his contract and then he will be off about five or six weeks. He gets out next Friday and leaves Saturday with his church campers.

It is kind of funny because of all the lake places Rian has stayed at, Pat and Hag's place is still the favorite from when he was a teenager! Best part is the lake is full!

Have a day!

One year ago today, our world was rocked.

The day that Freddy died.

I had gone in early for some surgery, and when I was taken to recovery, Pat and Krl were allowed back to be with me. When they walked in I could tell something was wrong. Initially I thought that maybe the surgeon opened me up and I was filled with cancer.

When I became more lucid, Krl told Pat, "We've got to tell him!" Pat shook her head, and Krl repeated herself. Pat looked at me and simply said, "Freddy died".

I was dumbfounded. "Do what?", I asked. "Freddy died", Pat said again.

Pat went on to explain that Freddy didn't come to work by the usual time, so through a chain of events, the boys went to check on him. They found him in his bed.

And our world was, and is, forever changed.

In all honesty, we had all probably feared this happening. I know I had worried about it before when I would pass by and Freddy's vehicle was not at the office.

Freddy was a big man, had some health issues, and was working in a high stress job, trying to salvage what had once been the flagship company business.

The majority of us had moved on beyond the trials and tribulations of the family business and the position it was left in after doing a deal with some seedy unscrupulous men who worked for an international company. Yet Freddy, with his dogged determination refused to give up, even though it would have been much easier.

I can't help but wonder "what if". Did the job kill Freddy? Did he die because of a broken heart from the broken dream. I don't know. Would he still be with us if he had turned loose. We'll never know.

I know that we were raised to believe a man at his word. When Freddy and I traveled to Kewlona, BC, Canada for a meeting with the interim President of the international business, (this was after they had cancelled our contract with them after we had spent $4.4M with them), we were told that they would do "Whatever is necessary to make your company whole!"

Freddy was still waiting at the time of his death.

We continue to wait.

There is no justice in this world, so I am leaving it to GOD to get justice with these men and their company.

It has been a year of adjustment for all of us, especially Freddy's spouse and kids. We all have made tremendous strides. Some days are easier than others. Today is not one of those.

We will survive because we are survivors from a long line of survivors.

And on top of that, it is what Freddy would want.

One year ago, just about this time, I talked with Fred for the last time.

It is a conversation that I know will live forever in my mind.

I had called Fred to tell of the acceptance of my offer in compromise by the treasury. We talked briefly about there was hope for other family members plagued by a similar situation. I told him of my impending surgery the following morning. "Hey, I love you man", were his last words to me.

Hey, love you man!

Dr. Mackie warned me that the problem with my surgical incision would get worse before it got better.

This morning I am a believer in his prophecy.

The meds have been hard on my system, but if they do what they are supposed to I will suffer through it.

I talked with Chris yesterday and told him I would try to come in today, but not to be surprised if I didn't make it.

Krl is wanting me to go to the surgeon today. I am reluctant because sometimes too much doctoring is worse than not enough.

I didn't expect to be down this long. I don't need to be down.

I am still having mixed emotions about Hillary's situation. Barack is wanting the super delegates to commit before the end of today's primaries so he can secure the nomination. Many legislators are wanting to wait until tomorrow in order to give Hillary time to bow out.

While I was in the doctor office yesterday I read an article about John Edwards and his family. I continue to be impressed with the man and his wife. In this article they asked him his take on both front runners for the democratic presidential nomination. He was complimentary of both. Hillary possesses an inner strength and he specifically mentioned her national health care plan. Barack and his platform of change are very attractive.

That doesn't make it any easier. Actually I would like to see a general election between Hillary and Barack. There is going to be a winner and a loser. Crazy thing is the loser isn't going to be runner up, they will end up being third place.

I may be wrong but unless something big comes along I think John Mc Cain is going to have to pay for the sins of "Dumbya".

I can't imagine spending the enormous amount of money these candidates have spent, will spend, and losing.

And the dollars might be easier to part with than voter rejection.

FATHER, bless America and her citizens as they make important choices over the next few months.

We spent four hours out and about, the majority of that at Dr. Mackie's.

My diagnosis was correct. I have an infection in one of the fourteen incision sites. Dr. Mackie told me we did the right thing coming in today instead of waiting to see the surgeon tomorrow.
When we walked out of his office I had four prescriptions and a hint of a limp from a monster shot of rosephenol in my glutimus maximus or minormas. (It was my backside in any case). Later today I will begin the oral antibiotics.

After a couple more stops I was weak kneed and sweating like a horse!

I had a rash of calls in a short time span. No telling what I told who! No, I'm not delirious yet. I had a call from Edwin wanting some freight rates for South Texas, so that necessitated a call to K.O. to confer. Then I had a call from Memama. Her tax lawyer had called her wanting to speak with me. It took a couple of tries but I finally got through to him. He is a very nice gentlemen and he thinks he can do some good for her.

I guess I continue to be a poster child for the entire family. Thursday will be a year since I received notification from the IRS of their acceptance of my offer in compromise. I am hopeful that before too long all the rest of the family will enjoy the same luxury.

One other call I had was from Chris at the parts store. I know he probably thinks I am stringing him along but right now how I feel is extremely "iffie". I had initially planned on going back to full days this week. But I hadn't planned on the infection complication either.

I'm kind of going through Pat withdrawal right now. I've never realized how much comfort there is in having her on hand to read between the lines and tell us exactly what is going on. Maybe before too long she will be able to come home. I know last week when we talked she was really homesick.

Well, to have started out as an update this post has gotten out of hand.

More later.

FATHER, YOU know!

Yuk.

One eleven this morning and I am staring at the clock. I guess in my sleeping I rubbed my "problem" incision and it woke me. So, now I am up, have ingested my pain meds and am waiting for them to catch up to me.

The one incision is very mad. Hot, puffy, and extremely sore to touch. Why is it that my luck is such that my surgeon only works three days a week? Tu, Wed, Th. Must be nice.

Krl has been having headache episodes again. I am very concerned. I had high hopes that Dr. Mackie's treatment for sinusitis along with some dental work had remedied her problem, but, now it is back.

I suppose my biggest fear is that neither of us will feel well enough to enjoy our trip. Another concern is that the first hurricane of the year made land along the Belize/Mexico border. The Yucatan Peninsula was expected to receive five inches of rain and weakening winds.

I spent part of my afternoon surfing ebay again. I guess I have the bug again so I have been looking at sail boats. I may be contagious though as Krl even came in and watched over my shoulder. We do seem to have a difference in what we are shopping for.

My whole sailboat theory is "recreational". I have no desire to particpate in the America Cup.

I am trying to digest the latest development with Barack and his church ties. For any who missed the news, he and his wife resigned from their church Saturday.

I realize that when someone makes a decision to run for office they agree to all the scrutiny every aspect of their life will receive. My personal take is where the lines should be drawn. Some say it is all fair game. I disagree. I think that some things are sacred, some things are private.

With last weeks release of the controversial book by "Dumbya's" former aide, and with the movie about the Florida recounts of the 1980 presidential election, my disdain for the current administration only grows. The deception and lies may have begun long before anyone suspected.

I find myself having a difficult time separating McCain from "Dumbya" although the only ties would be through their political association.

So much for soap box politics.

I think my meds are beginning to work.

I have been trying to analyze my recent dream sleep. When Doctor Mackie read my sleep study he prescribed something for "restless leg syndrome". I don't know if this med works on restless legs, but my assessment is that it has really affected my dreams.

I dream about anything and everything. Work, prospective work, recreation, money, sex, travel, design projects. I have rehashed lots of different situations. Sometimes I enjoy the advantage of "knowing" what is supposed to happen next. Other times I seem to combine different aspects of what is going on in my life and I have come up with some bizarre solutions!

It is amazing what that little pill can trigger.

Well, I think I am going to try to study my eye lids again.

I'd say have a day, but in this instance, have a night!

FATHER, I am tired. I am hurting. I give it up to YOU.