One year ago today, our world was rocked.

The day that Freddy died.

I had gone in early for some surgery, and when I was taken to recovery, Pat and Krl were allowed back to be with me. When they walked in I could tell something was wrong. Initially I thought that maybe the surgeon opened me up and I was filled with cancer.

When I became more lucid, Krl told Pat, "We've got to tell him!" Pat shook her head, and Krl repeated herself. Pat looked at me and simply said, "Freddy died".

I was dumbfounded. "Do what?", I asked. "Freddy died", Pat said again.

Pat went on to explain that Freddy didn't come to work by the usual time, so through a chain of events, the boys went to check on him. They found him in his bed.

And our world was, and is, forever changed.

In all honesty, we had all probably feared this happening. I know I had worried about it before when I would pass by and Freddy's vehicle was not at the office.

Freddy was a big man, had some health issues, and was working in a high stress job, trying to salvage what had once been the flagship company business.

The majority of us had moved on beyond the trials and tribulations of the family business and the position it was left in after doing a deal with some seedy unscrupulous men who worked for an international company. Yet Freddy, with his dogged determination refused to give up, even though it would have been much easier.

I can't help but wonder "what if". Did the job kill Freddy? Did he die because of a broken heart from the broken dream. I don't know. Would he still be with us if he had turned loose. We'll never know.

I know that we were raised to believe a man at his word. When Freddy and I traveled to Kewlona, BC, Canada for a meeting with the interim President of the international business, (this was after they had cancelled our contract with them after we had spent $4.4M with them), we were told that they would do "Whatever is necessary to make your company whole!"

Freddy was still waiting at the time of his death.

We continue to wait.

There is no justice in this world, so I am leaving it to GOD to get justice with these men and their company.

It has been a year of adjustment for all of us, especially Freddy's spouse and kids. We all have made tremendous strides. Some days are easier than others. Today is not one of those.

We will survive because we are survivors from a long line of survivors.

And on top of that, it is what Freddy would want.