Guess who is up in the middle of the night?

Don't know what's going on here.

This may require a little inquiry. Dr. Mackie added one additional medication to what I have been on for several years. I am beginning to wonder if we are having a little adverse interaction.

Monday, Monday. I didn't get anywhere near what I had intended to do, done. Thank you, Walmart money card. Usually, on the weekends when I begin driver settlements, I will print card activity for the week. That gives me an opportunity to do deductions for any debits that aren't supported by a ticket indicating a truck expenditure. I have one little driver, that is beginning to make it a habit using the card for personal things. I have countered this by leaving only a small balance on the card.

I new from looking at card activity earlier in the week this man had several card uses. Yet when I went to print the reports, the web reporting had lost from May 28 to June 24. They had began a "new" current month, but usually you can scroll down and pick the time frame you want or need. Just not Saturday, or Sunday.

I called the customer service line and guess what? I got someone in India or Pakistan. In her poor English, she had no answers except, they are doing a monthly update. Why, I inquired were they doing it days early. She had no answer. The only thing she could tell me was check back tomorrow and it should be completed and the prior month should be available in the scroll down list.

To be honest, I knew the month end was coming, but they usually end the month on the twenty-eighth and begin the new one with the twenty-ninth. I usually make it a point to print reports prior to the expected end of the month. I wasn't prepared for an early end.

The reports came available a little before noon. Which meant I didn't make Kinko's until after lunch, which means I didn't get to the Post Office until mid afternoon, which meant I didn't get to the added "to do's" until even later.

Krl seems to have gotten off to a good start for the week with her trucks and drivers. The last couple have been different and complicated, yet she is expanding the lanes and vendors which is good.

I visited with my buddy from Hawley yesterday and he told me they got three inches of rain Saturday night. We didn't get but a small amount on our side of time. I have watched the weather all yesterday and it would appears there was a good chance to get some needed precipitation.

I'm kind of enjoying listening to the thunder.

Night before last we went to bed with the television on. Don't ask me, sometimes I can't find where Krl puts the remote. Anyhow, I woke to the booming animated voice of Billy Mays. Of course I had read that he had died Sunday morning at his home. It was kind of weird waking up that way.

Mark another one down for our generation. Michael, Farrah, Billy. 50, 62, 50. We are ageing.

I had actually forgotten several of the songs MJ had recorded and made popular. He was very talented, and to be honest I had wondered just what his London tour would be like. We will never know but I bet it would have been good!

I have to confess a few things. I never bought a MJ CD or tape and I never bought a Farah poster. On the other hand, I did buy some oxy-clean from Billy.

I bet I fall in the lower percentile of the populous there.

I am at the parts store today. I had a call from Chris yesterday and he was telling me how slow things had been. I guess we have become spoiled to the windmill traffic. Usually when the farming is busy, we see very few farmers or their hired hands. Yet the windmill traffic had been more steady. I am beginning to wonder what it is going to be like, once all the construction is completed.

Last week at the parts store I watched a co-worker scratch a lottery ticket. It was for the new game "Blockbuster" and features prizes from $20 to $2.5 million with total pay out for the game of $500M. This co-worker was telling me he had been told that chances were better if you played a new game at the beginning. I don't know exactly why that would be an advantage, especially if it is a game of chance.

I watched as this man meticulously uncovered all his numbers and symbols. I assure you, this card was completely naked. Not one iota of the covering ink was left. Finally he began scratching off the numbers he had to match. This co-worker explained to me that he was obsessive compulsive when it came to scratch offs. It had to be done neat and orderly.

When this man completed his game, he didn't win anything. $20 out, nothing coming in.

On Friday when I made my unscheduled trip to see the company attorney I gave in to a little obsessive compulsive behavior of my own. What I mean is that I think often times we are put into situations that could be life altering, maybe we should be more receptive to opportunities.

I had to make a stop for gasoline while I was a little out of my usual path. On a whim, I bought one of the aforementioned game cards. I brought it home and laid it on the counter where it stayed until Saturday evening. When I did scratch it, I was a winner. Not the big winner, but suffice it to say, I am on the positive side of the game.

That is almost totally out of character for me, because I don't gamble very often or very much.

I have always heard it said, "Don't gamble if you can't afford to lose it".

Maybe I got it out of my system. After all I farmed for a number of years.

As many of you know, I enjoy the TVLand station. While I have been writing this, I have had opportunity to see the original "Three's Company" episode. I had never seen it before. That was a cute series.

Mark another one down with John Ritter.

Well, lots of rambling.

Have a day!

FATHER, thank YOU for YOUR blessing of rain. I pray that YOU will bless our family and friends with good crops. How great YOU are!

Well, my yesterday didn't turn out any where close to where I thought it was headed.

I did a lot of soul searching yesterday morning, without any clear defining answers emerging. I had made a phone call to our attorney and scheduled an appointment later in the day.

One of the things I detest doing on my day off is driving. Anywhere! But with the battle regarding the long-time seasonal work, I felt it was worth it.

Over the fifteen years I have worked there I have developed many friendships that far exceed the scope of the work. While it has its frustrating moments, it has also held more than its share of fulfilling ones.

If it weren't for the people of the small community, I would probably walk away without a second thought.

When I made my appointment, I didn't know which one of the three lawyers I would see. I have worked with all of them. The father and two sons. The family has a prestigious group of diplomas, including the University of Texas, St. Mary's, Boston College, and Duke. The mother of the family is a University Professor.

Probably the most impressive thing about this group is core values. They have been passed down and shared. More than anything, this group believes and fights for justice.

I've always said the father of the group was born way too late. He is hot headed and spirited, known for exotic boots and his handle-bar mustache, He would probably fit much better with Judge Roy Bean. He believes in preserving nature as his law offices reflect. The entire landscape is filled with what at a quick look would be thought to be over-grown weeds and grasses. That assessment would be wrong. All of this is natural vegetation to this area. There isn't a bunch of messing with nature. The plant life relies predominately on nature for water. Amazingly, the natural vegetation has beckoned a flurry of natural fawna.

When I walked in, the receptionist greeted me, and asked my name. I responded and she had a quizzical look on her face. "Who were you seeing", she asked. I told her I didn't know. She asked me to take a seat and quickly left the room, beginning a walk that would take her through three offices, finding an attorney free to see me.

I ended up seeing the elder statesman of the klan. And that was fine with me. I quickly explained the situation and un-packed my documents, handing them over the desk. He positioned his reading glasses and began reading. After a while, he sat back and asked, "Is this man your friend?"

"No. Not even remotely", I responded.

He told me, "From what I have seen that is very true. You were right to consult legal counsel to review this document, and believe me you needed an attorney. It would have been a wreck if you had signed this document."

He began picking the document apart, while on a legal pad he was constructing a letter to the GM, inquiring and requesting changes. He did tell me according to the contract we were entitled to help construct and negotiate the contents therein.

I did confess to our attorney that we were struggling with committing to the seasonal work because of some the surrounding cast.

He told me, we were fixing to learn a lot about "intent" when we get a response to our requests. If the GM makes the changes, he might be O.K., if he refuses we probably need to cut bait and run!

And I felt better about it all.

Not only do I call this man our attorney, I consider him a friend. And I thank him for that.

Almost three months ago. I talked with the software inventor who built the program the family business used. Compared to what I use now, his product was a Cadillac, with a capital K. My description to others was "Pour the data in the top hole and it runs out of all the appropriate bullet holes. One time in, and it filters everywhere, billing, payroll, truck settlements, receivables. Everywhere!"

Back in the nineties, it was extremely expensive. While it had come down, three months ago, Krl and I toyed with the idea of buying it. They set up a three month payout, and you didn't get the product until you completed payment. If you were late or defaulted, you forfeited any monies paid. As it turned out while we were leaning towards thanking them but declining, a number of things happened that caused us to miss the purchase window.

Once again, someone greater than us took control. Thank YOU LORD!

During our conversations with this software guru three months ago, I had made some inquiries about possibilities. While he thought I was a little off the wall, he was intrigued. I had asked about the possibility of their program, available from anywhere that had internet access, hosted by the software company.

Yesterday I received a phone call from this software man. I could tell he was excited. It turned out my idea is now a reality. It is not available with all the added bells and whistles, but the basic model is available, with a twelve month commitment, a reasonable down payment, and monthly licensing fees of $111 per month. the licensing fee provides for any and all updates and support.

In addition they also came out with a model to be installed on the customer's hardware that is even cheaper. They call it the budget model.

I should have insisted for some percentage! It was my idea!

Turns out, hosted version has a limited number of spaces, they do all the backups, and many of the modules that are "space hogs" aren't available. Storage capacity is a concern.

Since our conversation, Krl and I have talked, and I have e-mailed a couple more questions to Dan the man in software!

My life could become so much simpler!

And I am a simple kind of a guy!

I want to also confess, I got absolutely none of my scheduled Friday tasks done.

Today, I am attending the "big" McLeod Reunion, taking place at Southern Hills CoC gymnasium. This is the remnant of my Grandad McLeod's family. There were eleven brothers and sisters. Amazingly, I will be in the younger half of the group because most of the attendees will be getting quite old. It seems fewer and fewer of the young family members choose to attend.

I have been guilty of this as well. There have been times I have been in town when the reunion took place and I didn't attend.

I guess I have become more mellow. Several things have happened that have altered my values. Of course losing Fred and TJ would be monumental, but I also lost a cousin who had chastised me before her death. There were three of us cousins at ACU at the same time. My cousin took charge of the reunion, only a short time before her death and she had challenged me and our cousin from Stephenville to attend. I think the only one I have missed since then was two years ago when TJ died, the reunion was right on the heels of her funeral.

Memama's two surviving sisters, and her brother are coming to the reunion. This will be Robbie's first family outing since Uncle Jesse died. Wade and Judy are stopping by to pick her up in Brownwood. Betsy and Scottie are driving in from Fort Worth. Afterwards they are all going to Memama's to spend the night and go to church Sunday. While this use to be a couple of times a year occurrence, with Uncle Jesse's mobility issues the last few years, it had become more and more infrequent.

So I have framed my day!

Have a good weekend!

FATHER, thank YOU for your peace and calm. Forgive me when I fizz. YOU strengthen me.

Whew.

I feel mentally exhausted.

I feel I am being tested. Having just completed the forty days of personal distress, it seems I am launching immediately into a period of business distress.

I find myself in a situation with the seasonal work that I don't like and I am not comfortable with. I had received a contract from the GM that is not even vaguely close to the proposal I submitted. Don't get me wrong, the numbers are right, but all the conditions seem to have been altered. When I read it, I felt there was no way I could sign it, and I felt sure that the company's attorney would not let me.

I am having a difficult time because this has been the lifeline for 15 years. The problem has not been with the work, because we have developed good relations with our employees. There has been a change of pertinents. Board members, office personnel, and general manager.

The old GM and I could sit down and talk, work things out, shake hands and know that each one of us would live up to our word. I don't have this comfort level with the new GM. In fact, I don't know I could trust him as far as I could throw him. So far he has not been a man of his word and he appears to lack backbone.

I am leaning toward walking away from the seasonal work. Krl is encouraging me too. But this leaves a huge void, and I wonder what is going to fill this vast emptiness.

It is a leap of faith, and I am having a hard time turning loose of the handrail.

Today is probably going to be the day my decision is made.

I was shocked last evening when I read of Michael Jackson's death. Today I think, "What a waste". Needless to say, he was extremely talented. He had become extremely extravagant, living a lavish life style that some say he couldn't afford. One report said he spent 20 to 50 million dollars more each year than what he took in, for the last ten years. I have seen many segments this morning from friends, talking of Michaels insecurities, and the pressure he felt. It is a shame. I can remember when the Jacksons hit the big time.

Oh, for the good ol' days.

FATHER, thank you for being faithful to meet my needs. I ask that you give me peace with my decision concerning the seasonal work. Help me to be thorough in my process. Bless me oh LORD!

I've been back at the parts store this week. I seem to have been struggling to find my groove. Krl has chastised me for wearing too many hats. She is right though. I don't think I did any one of them justice.

Pepa had to re-plant the cotton we were trying to help come up last week. I know it was a difficult decision because of the expense. I am not sure how much the seed will cost without the technology fee.

I can't believe planting seed now costs $300 a bag. Yikes!

I seem to still be suffering from my week on the farm. Lots of "to do do's" didn't get done because I would leave early and return late. I still have a list although it is getting shorter.

The return to the parts store has been good. It has had it's spurts of busy. I've had some of those projects that take some research, while other projects have been dead ends. Probably the most frustrating was a customer who called needing to know how much they had paid for an aerosol cleaner. I went through all of this customers invoices because the part number they gave me wasn't good in our system. Turns out, they bought the cleaner from an other vendor.

I did mis-print the reunion schedule, we will have the weekend of the fourth of July off.

Krl has struggled with the trucks. We had developed some pretty good circles we could depend on, or so we thought. We had blamed the Mexican holidays for the problems when we had them. Now for two weeks the return loads have been almost non-existent. That means we have been lured to other lanes which concerns me, because most of these vendors have no pay history with us or slow pay history.

I went in for my annual physical last week. Everything came back good, which meant I had a new lease on life concerning my prescriptions. Crazy thing was they were all written together a year ago, yet it took weeks for them to run out. I argue with our little pharmacist all the time. I ask her why medications filled on the same day never run out together. It must be the new math.

Krl is dragging her feet about going in for her annual physical, but she is going to have to do it.

Krl has officially opened her pool. Kat and a friend came over and swam yesterday. We have been working on it for about a week. It sure looks inviting. Crystal clear!

Ln and her beau, Christian had been coming over and helping Meme plant flowers. On Monday Christian and I worked in the yard. Actually he worked in the yard, I worked on the lawn mower.

Yep, two times in the shop, and it is still doing the same thing, this mower could be looking at its last blade of grass. We are going to try one more thing. Max, Chris and myself had discussed the fuel problem, and when the repairman came in to inquire about the mower he was shocked to learn it was not performing. We told him what we were suspecting and he seemed to concur. We have decided it has an exhaust problem, causing the carburetor to become too hot and vaporize the fuel. The repairman brought me another muffler for me to try. We don't know if it has a restriction or a leak, but we are going to try it.

We have done a tune up, changed the carb and now are changing the exhaust.

My Friday dance card is already filling up. My plan is to go into the attic early tomorrow morning to check out our attic fan. It had been making a racket that makes me think it is going out. That is one of those lovely jobs to do in summer.

When Trc re-did the house two years ago, she kind of left her imprint on it. She likes the color black. Her car is black, Brntly's truck is black. We had restricted the use of too much color, but when we arrived home, the front door was black and the new roof was black (or close to it, black with a little gray). She accented the house with black awnings. It is very stark and looks nice, but I am convinced the black roof is considerably hotter than other colors. My former neighbor tells me, nine degrees hotter than a sandalwood or tan shingle. He claims he and his father-in-law conducted a test.

I'm not arguing.

Rian and Erica are in Las Vegas. Jimmy, Rian's boss found some unspent funds to send Rian to a conference in Las Vegas. They say the fastest growing problem area for school administrators is girl gangs. So Rian is attending a conference called "Mean Girls". The school paid for Rian's trip, and they decided it would be a fun quick trip for Erica to go on too.

In other news, Rian's boss had participated in a conference last year at Harvard. This year he has been asked back as a group leader and speaker. Jimmy's problem is juggling his time, because this summer is probably the last summer his daughter will be home or not have her own agenda.

I thought I had graduated to another sleep mode lately. It seemed like I would sleep to six o'clock. But, for some reason this morning I woke at three.

Today marks two years since Tj died, and my heart hurts.

It is going to be a long day!

Hope you have one!

FATHER, thank YOU for the blessings of this day! I know they are going to be good ones. You are good!

We have hit a stretch of three weeks that we have family reunions. This past weekend was the Stevens-Freeman Reunion, taking place in Sweetwater. This next weekend is the Big McLeod reunion, taking place at Southern Hills. This one would be my grandfather's family. The following weekend will be Lake Brownwood and Memama's family.

Krl and I drove to Sweetwater Saturday afternoon to do the auction at the reunion. It seemed to be off a little, but end results showed it was actually up thirty or forty dollars from last year. Still at $1760 it is far off the top end. Overall, the numbers were down. Attendance, auction items and auction revenue.

Of course the purpose of the auction and raffle is to pay for the costs of the reunion. Meeting room, meals, postage and the likes. So usually, if numbers are down, so are expenses.

While Krl and I drove home Saturday night, Sunday morning I drove back over and went to reunion church services. Afterward I drove home to get started on driver and truck settlements.

I am still trying to figure out how to deal with our little problem driver, so I did a written reprimand that will go into his employee file. Just in case we have to deal with this again, at least we are documenting everything.

After the poor ending to last week, and trying to cover things after one truck went down, it has meant a sporadic start to this week. Trying to find that stride!

The campers returned home late Saturday. It sounded as though they had a good time but were glad to see the house.

Kat and Trc came over and brought me a baggie of oatmeal raisin homemade cookies for Father's day. This has kind of become a tradition. It's not like I need them, but the thought is nice.

I'd better get started chasing my day! Hope you have one!

Oh FATHER, rescue me!

My butt is dragging.

Yesterday was a long, long day. Remind me next time to take my own vehicle.

Pat, Memama, and Pepa picked me up yesterday morning, a little after eight. We were supposed to be at the funeral home in Brownwood by 10:00, and we would go from there to the cemetery.

I have to say, this was one of the most laid back funerals I have ever attended. The 10:30 slid to 11:00, they took Uncle Jesse to the cemetery before everyone had arrived at the funeral home. In fact, there were a few people who got there after his body had been transported, that missed their opportunity to say goodbye.

When the procession arrived at the cemetery, it was greeted by a large contingency of family and friends who skipped going to the funeral home and went directly to the burial service.

The service was simple, having congregational singing, the reading of one scripture, and closed with a prayer.

We returned to the family life center for a noon meal, a ministry of the women of the Austin Avenue Church, before having the memorial service at 1:30.

The memorial service was nice. There were songs from CD's, the reading of the obituary by a friend, a prayer by a nephew, a brief remembrance by a grandson, some words from the heart by the youngest son, and a final memorial by the oldest son, before closing with a conregational singing of The Lord Bless and Keep you.

Robbie and her family are doing well. Robbie had written the sweetest little note to Uncle Jesse to be put in his inside coat pocket, but one of the twins who is studying to be a mortician arrived in time to help get Jesse ready for the family to view his body and she thought differently and pinned the note to the lapel of his jacket.

You know there are going to be some adjustments for all of the family.

After the service, thumbprint cookies along with coffee, iced tea and lemonade were served to all who attended the service.

Krl had decided not to go to the funeral. She had a truck that she didn't have covered with a load, and we discussed it, when she said, "Uncle Jesse would tell me to tend to business".

I had placed my phone on silent and vibrate, but during the burial service I felt the phone vibrate. After the service was concluded, I walked away and looked at my phone, a truck driver had called, even though he had been instructed not to. I called him back and he was in Laredo and having a problem with his truck.

I don't know if any of you know the helpless feeling of having equipment three or four hundred miles away, having a problem when you are not in a position to deal with it.

The memorial was over about 2:30, and mentally I planned a schedule that would get me home between four and four-thirty. That didn't happen. It was probably after four when we began to try to get loaded up. Then Pepa insisted we go by the lake to see Coach and Jani.

For the life of me, I can't understand this. We had just left the church where we had left Coach and his family.

Long story short, I got home shortly after seven in the evening.

So today, I am trying to pick up the pieces of my yesterday.

I hate days like today.

I will never catch up to it.

FATHER, I need a lot of help here.

This will be quick. I have been helping Pepa on the farm. I worked a deal with Pat, and i will make up the time over the course of the summer at the parts store.

Uncle Jesse died yesterday. On Monday, they had removed all the life support, including oxygen. Memama talked with Robbie and she said with every breath you thought it was his last, but he found one more, until his final breath.

I am sad, but I know he is in a better place, he is not struggling to breathe and he is whole.

Tomorrow we will go to Brownwood for his burial in the morning and a memorial service tomorrow afternoon.

Have a day.

FATHER, you got a good one when Uncle Jesse went over to your side. FATHER I lift up his family for your gifts of comforts and care. I pray for safe travel for all of those traveling for his services.

Happy Birthday Tj!

This appears to be another blue day. I will be so glad when June is over.

I got all the driver settlements and billing done, so I was able to watch my NASCAR race. Michigan was the location. With everything going on in the auto industry, there were lots of segments with drivers promoting "their" make of vehicle. It was a really good race that came down to fuel mileage. The 48 had taken the lead from the 16, but when they were coming to take the white flag, the 48 ran out of gas. It appeared the 16 had it in the bag when he slowed on the backstretch, out of gas. That allowed the 5 to make the pass and take the win. The 24 was second. So what looked like one in the bag for Jimmy Johnson, fell into Greg Biffle's lap, only for Mark Martin to slip up and take the win with Jeff Gordon running second.

When the race was over, I gathered all my invoices that needed copying and I headed for Kinko's. I walked in to find only one customer who was on their way out. I have a little routine when I make my copies, so as I began, it amazed me that a steady stream of customers began coming in. In fact, the girl working there told me "See what you started?"

Fifty-four copies later, I gathered my copies and originals and walked out the door. I was needing to load some money on fuel cards for trucks, so I detoured by Wal-Mart. Once I was done there I headed for the grocery store.

Krl had given me a short list, but I also do a mental list of what we have used, so there are always some additional items.

They are doing a re-model on the store we frequent, so I was not looking forward to going in. I hate it when they mess with everything. My understanding is that they are going to "flip" the entire store. Use to you would go in and the bread and condiments were first thing inside, followed by the produce and meat markets across the back. If you needed pharmaceuticals, they were as far away from the door as you could put them. In fact you had to go all the way through the store to pick up a prescription. Now bread moved closer to produce while chips and condiments moved halfway across the store. Other shifts include some that they simply switched the rear half of an aisle with the front half of the same isle.

What should have been a quick stop, ended up taking over double the time.

I saw one of the shift managers and couldn't resist giving an earful. He was very courteous with offers of assistance.

When I made my last stop at the customer service counter to get Krl's cigarettes, I was visiting with the person behind the counter, and she told me our long time store director was no longer working there. In fact, she said he was no longer working for the chain. That was a huge surprise for me because he had been there as long as we have shopped there.

That makes two store directors in a year that we have lost. One from both of the stores closest to our home. If what I am hearing is correct, both are no longer with their respective former employers.

By the way, the primary reasons we shop where we shop is because of the people and the fact they carry Krl's cigarettes which are somewhat exotic and not carried by many stores. Now we may have to re-think that.

When I got home, I unloaded the groceries and took them in the house. Krl began putting them up. We were discussing what we were going to eat for supper and decided to have leftover hamburgers we had grilled Saturday night.

While I was at the store I had picked up some zucchini. Krl and I use to go to Gardski's and zucchini sticks were a favorite appetizer. Krl and I did a tag team on them and I sliced them while she battered them. We got them in the skillet and in a short time we were feasting them! It was delicious.

Late yesterday I talked with Memama and she had talked with Robbie in Brownwood. Uncle Jesse is not doing well at all. In fact, Little Scottye talked with Jesse's doctor and the doctor told him it was just a matter of time. Scottye asked what sort of time they could be looking at and the doctor said possible four days, maybe sooner.

For those of you who don't know Uncle Jesse, he had a lung transplant several years ago. Initially they had thought he suffered from emphysema, but later found it was something very similar, but also different. Actually, he has out-lived the prognosis of the transplant team. In fact he has usually done that with regularity. For the last couple of years he has had a difficult time, especially the last few months, and you have to wonder about quality of life. It has to be difficult for Robbie and the boys to sit by and watch him struggle.

When I was talking to Memama, I told her I was sad to hear what the doctor had told Scottye, but the doctor isn't the one calling the shots. I ask that you continue to lift Jesse and his family up in prayer.

Uncle Jesse is a very special man.

Have a day!

FATHER, thank YOU for all the blessings we enjoy. FATHER we lift Uncle Jesse and his family up to YOU for YOUR gifts of healing and care and comfort. FATHER we ask your will be done. You are all seeing all knowing.

For those of you who know me well, I have been frayed around the edges lately. Yep, I was ragged around the edges.

I find myself often wanting some particular thing to happen that I am forcing the issue, and trying to take matters in my own hands.

I keep having to talk myself down, and I am sure that GOD goes, "Here we go again".

It is not that I don't trust his driving, I am just impatient and want to backseat drive.

So every once in a while, he lets me have control, only to prove to myself that I am out of control.

Sometimes it takes a distinct effort for me to be sure that he is the man in charge, not I.

You know, my life is much more laid back, much more enjoyable when I rely on the fact that everything is unfolding as he intends.

I did some broad tallying and the number who should be at the family reunion next month is mid to upper nineties. Pretty wild since the original group only numbered 19 or so.

Tomorrow is Tj's birthday. We will be at thirty days in our forty day time period. I catch myself thinking about the number forty in the Bible and its significance.

FATHER, thank YOU. My hope is built on YOU.

For a number of years, since 1966 to be exact, my Mom's family has been getting together at Mountain View Lodge on Lake Brownwood. The only time this has not happened is after a subsequent owner of the Lodge got cross ways with Uncle Big Scottie, and for a couple of years the reunion was moved to Lake Buchannan. I guess you could say we were banned from Mountain View.

Initially the property was not developed. I think the original owners had some very admirable, yet idealistic plan on how much development they wanted. There was a thirteen unit motel with kitchenettes, a small store, gas (both on and off the water) , a few RV rentals spots and boat docks for rent. Any land sold for development was minimal.

Then "Whitey" as we called him, came on board. He began breaking up the acreage into lots, and laid out a large area of RV hookups. Where you could go there in the past, and know the traffic would be minimal, that all changed.

I guess we became spoiled to the secure sense of community that we enjoyed. Initially, only four units were needed. Over the years, as the family has grown, it became necessary to rent the entire facility plus some RV spots, plus some family members have their own access to lake property (through their families).

That reunion is only three weeks or so away. Rooms are very coveted.

Memama has always written a letter, sent to every family, making them aware of the dates, and the meals and activities planned.

This year, with Memama's injury, she has not put out the letter, so Thursday I volunteered to do it for her. Now I just have to get her to tell me what she wants written.

I think I am becoming drunk with power! I am in control. I bet I can get a room if I put a bogus date on some of the newsletters!

I suppose this is just another stage in the shift of responsibilities. Use to on Friday we would cook hamburgers, Breakfast was with your "sub" family within the family. Lunch was usually sandwiches. Saturday night was steaks we cooked, with everyone preparing their own baked potatoes, and pitching in to do salad and other sides. Sunday was a combination of all the left overs. Of course Memama coordinated all the meals.

Eventually, we began preparing briskets for Saturday night's meals, and Friday's burgers have gone by the wayside, because family arrives all night! In recent years, Coach subbed the Saturday night meal and the Sunday lunch meal to a caterer. Usually Humphrey Pete's.

One thing that has not changed is homemade ice cream after Sunday lunch.

That is a staple.

Out of the original group, we are short five, if my mind is working correctly. The additions to the group would require a calculator. The five missing would be Mema, Gan Gan, Aunt Jo, Fred and Terri. I suppose the scary thing is, that the entire population has aged. Memama and Pepa would be the oldest regular attendees, but would surrender that title if Uncle Bill attended. The other original couples would include Uncle Jesse and Robbie, Betsy and Stan, and Wade and Judy. I suppose the bracket would be from Pepa at 80 to Wade at 65.

Then we jump to cousins, Ron would be the oldest, and I guess I would fall in line next. There are some gaps that other family members would fill, but they don't attend regularly. There has also been some attrition due to divorce, and there are one or two who just aren't invited.

Uncle Jesse is not doing well. He and Robbie had moved to an assisted living facility, and while he is not doing any better, he was not doing any worse, yet there was no way Robbie could physically handle his care at home. This past week, they had eaten breakfast, and a little later, he aspirated, requiring a trip to the ER.

Those of you familiar with Uncle Jesse's situation know that he struggles to breathe, and this latest problem has only contributed to his problem.

I feel good today, surprisingly! Usually after my physical work I am sore to move. But I need the exercise!

I am also in a much better frame of mind about our customers who had been behind or lax in their pay. They seem to be doing better. Of course one or two good ones can help the way things look there.

For those of you who might want it, the three grandsons are at summer camp this coming week. Their address is; Reid, Holt and Drew
c/o Pine Springs Summer Camp
132 Spring Canyon Road
Sacramento, Nm 88347

I have already sent them my first letter and they actually won't leave until in the morning.

Hope you had a day and are having a weekend!

FATHER, thank YOU for all the blessings YOU pour down on us. We are not worthy. FATHER, thank YOU for the gift of rain. FATHER I lift up Uncle Jesse for your gifts of healing and care.

Local weather forecasts say we will be into summer like weather a week from now. I saw several century marks on the forecast highs around our area.

Yuk. I like my heat about medium.

It has been a strange week at the parts store. Traffic has been very sporatic. Early in the week it was so slow and boring. Everyone was in the fields. That all changed Wednesday afternoon. Coveted rain fell across the area. Many of the farmers and their help had been working dervishly, trying to beat the June 20 deadline for planting their crops that insurance requires. So after the rain, everyone had things to do and places to go, as they caught up on personal stuff that had accumulated since planting began.

I think the guys at the parts store thought I was lying, but it rained at our house in Abilene, three straight days.

That was good, but it was also bad.

I had mowed the front yard Saturday, then the mower had problems, so it went to the shop Monday and returned Tuesday. There is a retired man in Roscoe who has found a second career doing small engine repair. His diagnosis on my mower was in line with mine, so he removed and cleaned up the carburetor. Then he re-installed it, only to find it still had problems starting. Finally he discovered a pin hole in the primer bulb. Once he replaced it, it appeared the problem was solved.

I returned home with my mower, unloaded it, and mowed along the side of the house. The mower performed flawlessly.

I decided not to begin the back yard because the grass was still very wet and there was a threat of rain.

By now, the back yard is getting out of hand. In fact I think I could actually see the grass growing!

Wednesday saw afternoon rain, so mowing after work was not an option.

Thursday, I knew I had to mow, so after a brief respite I slipped on work jeans, a light colored T-shirt, and my work boots. I know, that doesn't seem like proper mowing attire, but growing up, my grandfather insisted on it, and to this day I think about it every time I mow.

I got all the equipment out of the garage, policed the yard, stowing water hoses and moving other objects, then I fired up the weed eater. This took longer than usual, but I really wanted a good close trim. Then the time came for the mower. It didn't start up as easily as Tuesday, but it did start (which was an improvement) and I began mowing. The grass was so tall, and so damp, I could not run the self propelled part, so I began taking less than full mower widths. Everything was fine until I killed the mower to dump the bag. It didn't want to start up again, but after some coaxing, it did. Until I needed to dump the bag again. Needless to say, a long process began.

Nothing frustrates me like an engine that has mystical intermittent problems. Finally, I decided to park the mower and try to complete the job Friday morning.

I see another trip to the shop in this mower's future.

This mower has a six and three quarter horsepower Tecumseh engine. When it performs, it does really well. Problem is, it is moody.

Rian and I talked and he told me how pleased he has been with his Husqvarna mower. I don't doubt it. I know when we made a change to Husqvarna chain saws, it was unbelievable. He tells me his mower is seven horsepower. Surprisingly, it was not out of line, price wise.

I am tempted to shop for another mower, BUT, I dont need to spend the money right now. In fact, right now I hate money.

More than that, I hate companies you work for who s-t-r-e-t-c-h pay terms and then lie about mailing the checks. I don't think it takes two weeks for mail to get from Arkansas to Abilene, or a week for mail to get from Houston to Abilene.

They may wonder why we don't want to work for them in the future.

Then we have one customer who is horrible at paperwork, and not smart enough to figure it all out after the fact. He also is our biggest receivable right now. And that is scary.

Monday night, I had heard Krl talking in her sleep. She said, "I'm going to have to get up and get me some crackers and cheese or something."

Shortly after, I watched her silhouette get up from the bed and go to the bedroom door. As she opened the door and stepped back, I was watching as she fell flat of her back. I jumped from the bed, opened the bathroom door and turned the lights on so I could see better and rushed to where she was at. I helped her to her feet and asked her where she wanted to go, as I held her up. She told me she didn't need any help and I needed to go back to bed. She grasped the door frame, as I released my hold. She stood there, shakily, until her legs became jelly and she sat down, very hard on the tile floor.

It happened so quickly, there was no time to catch her.

I picked her up again, and helped her back to the bed.

She is so bruised, and she can hardly move.

I had so hoped we could avoid anything like this, this summer.

And three months after being told a contract for the Fall work would be sent, it came in the mail. I have read it and see some things that make me wonder if the new GM is trying to "pull some sneaky business" or just what. Now it will go to the company attorney, and we will let the legal beagles work it all out.

Crazy thing is, I really don't care if we go or not. I do know however, that many of our long time employees "depend" on that work.

Isn't it odd, that as circumstances and supporting cast changes, the influences how you look forward to or dread something.

I saw a very cute news segment this morning. It seems that President Obama had a town hall meeting and a father attended, accompanied by his ten year old daughter (who was skipping her last day of school to go see the President). The father told the President about his daughter wanting to come to the meeting and he hoped she didn't get in trouble for missing school. The President asked if he need to write her a note and the father accepted the President's offer. The President wrote and deliver the note. It simply said, "Please excuse Kennedy's absence. She is with me. Barack Obama."

That'll be one for framing. Ten years old and already the recipient of a Presidential pardon!

Well, I think I will assault the mowing project again. I am hoping the mower just got too "hot" yesterday, so maybe if I mow in the cooler part of the day!

Speaking of day, have one!

FATHER, I could sure use some relief. thank YOU for the blessing of rain. You are faithful to meet our every need. Bless-ed assurance.

I have had a few comments about my letter to Fred and Tj, some through text, some through conversation and some even through the grapevine.

The comments through the grapevine seem some have ruffled feathers due to some content. My response to those who were offended is, prove me wrong!

One more day in my weekly work schedule. This has been another tough one.

Last week when we needed to juggle some duties and one driver didn't want to cooperate has come back to bite him on the butt. And he doesn't like it. Oh well, if you live by the sword you die by the sword.

I think the driver knows now that favors go both ways. You scratch my back and I'll scratch yours.

Hope you've had a week full of days!

FATHER, please.

Krl and I both thought the day yesterday was just a blue kind of day.

I finally got motivated and went to the pharmacy and the Post Office. I returned to the house and decided the grass was not going to get any shorter, so I began getting out the mower and weed eater. After servicing them, I started the mower and everything seemed fine. Krl came and took the mower and I got my weed eater and began edging and trimming around flowerbeds and sidewalks. When I was through, I took the mower from Krl and she took a break. I was almost through with the front when all the sudden the mower puffed a little white smoke and died.

An hour later, I had it running again, albeit very roughly. I finished the front before the mower began having more problems. I narrowed it down to fuel, it seems the float is sticking and it is running short of fuel. On a Saturday afternoon, there weren't any options for parts for a Tecumseh engine.

We returned everything to its proper place, and went into the house.

Krl made the comment, that we just don't have any luck. I begged to differ. We have lots of luck, it is just all bad!

Just kidding. Both of us were glad to finish the week from h-e-double l.

Last evening, we enjoyed a pork roast with potatoes and carrots, that Krl had put on to cook earlier in the day. It was good. A little different from our normal fare. In fact, most of our week was a little different. We had meatloaf one night, Ma Allen's one night and left overs from those meals covered other meal times. In fact, Ma Allen's had failed to give me the all important potato salad my first trip in, so I returned the next day to right the wrong. Mmmmm.

Krl retired to bed early, so I surfed the TV channels. I finally settled in on a Peter Paul and Mary special on TVLand. Mary is quite a bit bigger, Peter and Paul have much less hair, but I found myself enjoying their reunion. They still offer a unique type of music. I was so intrigued I went to their website and read up on them.

I didn't know it, but the Wedding Song was written by Noel Paul Stookey for PeterYarrow's wedding. He wanted to give the song to his friend as a wedding gift, but for some strange reason couldn't, so he have it to a charitable group. Now it has become the biggest seller ever in sheet music.

I am not sure, but I wonder if he was under contract and the song would have been part of the labels rights.

They had a clip of Paul singing the song, and it is very pretty, having a different melody and very meaningful lyrics.

I had sang the song before, and not even known it's history.

And I wonder how often that happens.

And now without Paul Harvey, we'll never know the rest of the story!

Have a day!

FATHER, I seem to be struggling. I need YOU.

Dear Freddy and Terri Jo,

I decided I would address both of you rather than separately. To have to do this again would be too difficult, and makes my heart hurt.

Fred, today marks two years into your eternity. Tj, in nineteen days you will mark your two years into eternity. Suffice it to say, May and June are difficult. In a span of forty days, we celebrate both of your birthdays and mourn both of your deaths. Fred at 56 years and Tj at 43. Both very young, and only a spec on a chart of eternity.

I often wonder what it is like, where you are. Are you in a time out? Are you aware of the what is happening here. I know that there is no pain, no hurt, no worries.

I like to think both of you are aware of everything, that you are like guardian angels watching over all of us you left behind. But just in case, I thought I would give you the highlights of what has gone one since you have been gone.

For Fred, the biggest news would be you have a grandaughter. Dakota Rain. FYI she has your eyes, and Pat and I agree we can see you in her. You would be so proud. She is a chunk! 31 pounds, and she has a couple of months until she will celebrate her first birthday. ( She has surpassed Drew Dagan, Rian and Erica's third boy, who will be two in December and weighs a hefty 28 pounds, he is a new addition since you left).

For Tj, you are not a Grandmother! And that is good.

In other big news, Jake and Lindsey are expecting twins, due in December. So far she has had a lot of morning sickness. By the way, Jake took a job with Sweetwater ISD, coaching defensive ends and teaching for Coach Slaughter (he is new from Clyde) and will begin in June.

Pat and Steve became grandparents, last July. Chloe is their grandaughter. It remains to be seen if Pat ends up being a Granny or Whoop Whoop or Wheezer, but I feel confident Hag will remain Grumpy. As usual, all the babies love Hag. Steph and JR moved to Palestine last summer and he is working with an accounting firm there. Pat makes pretty regular pilgrimages between Roscoe and Palestine.

J.K. is still in the metroplex. I don't see her much except for the bigger holidays. She still is very self sufficient and seems to do very well on her own.

Jason is still doing his Florida thing. In fact he moved his entire family there in January of 2009. They are all doing well. The boys are getting big. Big D went to state in Florida pole vaulting, as a freshman. The week prior to, he got hurt so he didn't do as well as everyone hoped. They finished their contract in Florida, and their next project has been postponed (due to the economy) until May next year, so they are moving home. they have been hauling equipment for the last two or three weeks. Their school just got out so it shouldn't be long until they are all back in Texas.

I have already given you the big news about Jake and Lindsey. They are very good helping and keeping check on Memama and Pepa.

Joni is living with her mother in Abilene, working at a trucking company (of all things!). She tells me that it is a lot more enjoyable when the company is making money! (We should have tried that! Hah!). Linda is still working at the Sears facility. I see them occasionally, and they go to Roscoe periodically. (I figure when Dakota gets home and the twins arrive it will be more frequent. They are very much "in to" nieces/nephews/grand-children, you can imagine. When I am working at the parts store I eat lunch at Memama's with Jake, and we tease him that when he and Lindsey have their babies, that will mean one for them, and one for Joni and Linda!

I know they'd sure take one! They do good doting on Dakota and I expect more of the same for the new babies.

Fred, after your death, Jake and Joni kept the business open for almost a year. It turned out your last hire, Daryl the Okie, was a wolf in sheep's clothing. After struggling for a time, they decided to shutter the business. I had told them I could understand wanting to continue the business, but was it their dream or their Daddy's dream? I think both of them would admit, it is much less stressful now.

Krl and I are well. She is running trucks, I help when I am not in the parts store. She is having some problems with osteoporosis. The last two years she has had a broken leg, two broken feet and broken ankles (at the same time), and currently is sporting some broken toes. Oh the perils of aging. Our kids are O.K.. Trc and hers are struggling with the poor economy. Lrn has a 4.0 GPA while being a full time student and working at the credit union as a teller. Ln is going to be a junior at AHS and excels in volleyball. She is working in FBC's daycare this summer. Kat is a big girl and is quite the softball player, yet she is in the gifted and talented program at school. Rian is a middle school assistant principal at Dunbar Middle School in Lubbock. Erica is the director of the pre-school at Greenlawn. Reid completed kindergarten, Holt is a comedian and talker, and Drew is a very happy boy.

My girls continue to be underachievers. Both display very poor choices in men. Both of their current choices in men have served time as guests of the state of Texas. I joke often, that who would have "thunk" Garry (Makai's ex) would be the cream of the crop! Addison is growing up, but doesn't have a chance with her idiot mother. I think if we wait long enough, her mother's "live in" will be back in the pokey and hopefully her mother too (God knows she needs to be incarcerated). Ollie is having lots of health issues. She continues to be a con artist. She has about worn out all of the family by borrowing and not repaying or producing. Her current goal right now is to be deemed as disabled. She is on indigent health care, food stamps and any other program that is available. Her sister should be brought up on fraud charges because she too abuses the systems from unemployment to welfare, to SSI.

I seem to have the extremes in children.

Pat and Hag are good. I have told you their big news. Chris continues to fight his demons. Kyle spends all his time between work and polishing his pickup.

Coach and his family seem to be doing well. Their biggest news is he resigned at Brownwood in January. He has taken the assistant head coaches job at Permian with Gary Gaines. I told him it might be nice not to be where the buck stopped for a change. Jani still has her work and she and Kelsi are living at the Lake until they find them a house in Odessa (coach is staying in an RV). Colb and his family are in a new house in the Denton area. Those girls are very pretty and a stark contrast to Rian's boys (quiet and reserved compared to wild and wooly)! They have added another girl to the previous two, Kennedy is her name. Kelsi's biggest news is that her nightmare is behind her after her auto accident. Hopefully her life will return to normal. Kirb transferred from Miami to Baylor for his Senior year of eligibility (Art is the head coach at Baylor). He suffered a broken foot at the beginning of the season which relegated his season to much less than any of us had hoped for. He did sign as a free agent with the 49ers. He went through mini camp and then they waived him, but I think they invited him back for camp in July.

Edwin has remarried. I know that you would have wanted him to Tj. His wife's name is Stephanie. It has not been without its difficulties. Apparently none of the kids were ready for someone to try to step in to their Momma's place. I think Steph is an exact opposite from you Tj. You have to admit, you weren't a conventional Mom. Shelb is still in Stephenville. I think his romance with Brittany is finally over. Rob is in Austin living with Efren and Angela (friends of Hank, Hag's brother), working and going to school. She lost one job due to scale backs but finally got another one. She got her a new car (Uncle Hag and Pat helped her get the financing). Of course she has already wrecked it two or three times. Wee is living and working in Edna (I think). He has a little girl friend, I saw a picture of them at her prom that Stephanie had sent to Memama. Rollo is growing up. We are all excited to have him come to Roscoe this summer.

Pat says Rob should have Tj tattooed on her forehead. She is your spitting image. She and Stephanie seem to butt heads pretty regular. I know that Edwin has a delicate situation to balance, but sometimes I think Rob not only lost her Mom, but her Dad too. I can't decide whether to talk to Edwin about it, and the situation hasn't been right to talk to him about it. I just don't want to alienate him because he will always be a part of our family, whether he wants to or not! I do know that all of your kids take any criticism of you and your mothering as an insult to you. They all have your fire!

All of us wonder and worry for Rollo.

I got to go down there last summer for four or five weeks. We got the bid to haul the seed for Gulf Coast. It was good to spend time with Et and to meet and get to know his new wife.

We had a big party and celebrated Pepa's 80th birthday in January. We invited all of his sisters, and all of Memama's brothers and sisters, as well as all of our families. Jeanetta and Douglas came from Indiana (Her family seems to be well. Their biggest news was that their granddaughter's fiance was tragically killed). I think everyone was there except you two, Et and his youngest two. It was a really fun day! I joke that it is was just like old times watching all the boys. The only difference is their bodies are much bigger but their brains are still the same size. Jake had brought a little scooter and they all took turns riding and wrecking it. I think even Rians boys were in awe of how "off the wall" their relatives were! And that is saying something.

This past Christmas, Rian and his family came to Abilene and the day after Christmas we went to the Mall so the boys could play. We had gone to an indoor playground but it was closed for the holiday. When we were headed to the mall's indoor playground Rian told me "Watch this Dad, my boys are the bullies of the playground." Thing is, he wasn't saying this in a good way. He told me his boys were really rough! Sure enough, when they entered, they were off and running. It is unbelievable how quickly they found others their age to play with. Before long, their Mom began calling for timeouts! As we had walked into the mall she began asking them what the rules were. As she would begin listing the rules they would begin reciting them with her from memory. No pushing, no hitting, no kicking, no biting, no cutting lines, just to mention a few. I think it was about Reid's second time out when I called him over and told him to tell the other little boy, "My Daddy can whip your Daddy". Rian told me, "Dad, please don't!" I just thought I might liven things up.

The most recent news involves Mom. On May 8, Pepa took her to the farm to help him hook up a plow. The tractor jerked and crushed her right hand between the drawbar and the clevis. They care-flighted her to Lubbock where she had two surgeries in three days. They placed four pins in her hand and wired the knuckles back together. Just this past week they have taken out all the pins and told her it is up to her to straighten her fingers out. Right now she has a claw hand.

Mom and Dad are doing as well as can be expected. They are ageing, and that is sad. They have better days than others both mentally and physically. As you would expect, the loss of their oldest and youngest children aged them tremendously. So it is ya'lls fault! (Just kidding!)

I just want you both to know, you are thought of often and are greatly missed. I don't know how many times I have thought I need to tell Fred that .... . . or I need to call Terri! Both of you can take pride that your children have continued to show the resilience and determination you instilled in them. The loss of both of you seems to have made the family closer. I know I feel I know your children better than I did. I know it is sometimes tempting to offer some tidbit of advice, but we all try to walk the fine line between helpful and intrusive. I think all of them know that advice or help is just a matter of asking.

I am sure I have missed some highlight, there are so many. So much to say and so little time to say it. I might have missed someone, know it was not intentional. Of course if there needs to be an addition or correction any one could add it through the comments.

I am finding it difficult to close. That seems kind of crazy. I guess this is some sort of therapy for me.

Know that I love you both and miss you. Rest in Peace.

Your brother, Don.

Jerland Fred Freeman Jr. May 16, 1951-June 6, 2007

Terri Jo Freeman Teltshik June 15, 1964-June 25, 2007

FATHER, Thank YOU for Freddy and Terri. Thank YOU for the memories we share of them. Thank YOU for their legacies, their children, and how Fred and Tj live on in them. FATHER, I ask YOUR blessings on all of us in a very difficult time. Help us to lift each other up.

On my drive home yesterday, I became very aware that I am set in my ways. Mind you, I am not admitting I am spoiled or anything of that sort.



As I traveled East on I-20, I was steadily gaining on a big truck pulling a van. This occurred over several miles, so I was reading the "rolling" bill board.



"Kids love pickles", it read.



I know mine did. Rian could consume a gallon jar of pickles before you realized he had opened them.



Back to the truck. It was owned or leased by Dalton's "Best Maid" products out of Fort Worth, proudly claiming to be "Best Maid since 1926".



I will admit, when I shop, I shop for brands I have "affiliations" with.



I can remember many years ago, for many years, my Dad's trucks along with Uncle J's, hauled cucumbers for Best Maid brands. From their producers in the Uvalde and Mayfield areas of Texas to their pickle farm just South of Fort Worth in Mansfield. I too, have hauled cucumbers into their yard of huge wooden brine tanks, where they begin their "pickling" process! The most remarkable thing is that the Best Maid brands began in a small single room grocery store.



I also admit when I walk down the can good aisle, I usually shop for "Bush" products. Baked Beans are one of my favorites. we have a history of having hauled into the Bush family canning facility in Muskogee in the past. Very impressive people, from top to bottom of their organization. Of course this would have to include the family TV celebrities, Jay and Duke!



A second choice would be for Del Monte canned goods, but it doesn't have the draw that Bush products do.



I draw the line with Bush at canned goods, and vehemently deny any affiliation with any Bush that was a politician.



I prefer Lays, or Frito branded chips. Once again we have worked with this people.



I prefer Campbell's soups. (My favorite is Chicken with Rice, although sometimes Tomato soup hits the spot).



I even have a convenience store preference, even though they are no longer in our area. Circle K. One of the first things I ever bought Krl was a Circle K cigarette lighter, and it seemed like when we dated there was always a Circle K we were pulling in to. A year or so ago I had been to South Texas and on the way back I saw a Circle K and pulled in and bought her another lighter. We both had a good light hearted laugh when she looked it over!



I prefer Chevrolet to Ford, Kenmore to Maytag, John Deere to International, Craftsman to Snap on or Mac! Pocket "T's to plain old "T" shirts.



Probably the most surprising area is that of religion, because I have become "less" set in my ways. I believe that it is more about heart than what sign is out front, and I don't really have an issue with women in worship or instrumental music.



I don't know if my liberation in some areas makes my favorites or preferences more credible or not. It just makes me, me.



Memama wet back to the doctor yesterday. The doctor removed ALL the pins, "debried" a lot of dead skin, and put a small gauze bandage on it. He gave her the admonishment, "Now it is up to you! You need to work those fingers, knuckle by knuckle, finger by finger, every hour of every day!"



It is going to be tough!



After some prodding and encouraging from Pepa, Krl and I finally agreed to begin dispatching another of his trucks. It had been parked, but an old driver wanted to come back. Actually this had much more to do with Krl than with me. I will admit I was leery of this driver. I had worked with him last year in south Texas and he was very high maintenance. It took a lot to keep him motivated. He and I talked and I told him what we were hauling, and asked how much he was wanting to run. He told me he wanted to run like the other drivers.



That would mean four to five hundred miles per day.



Three days into this project, I called the driver to make sure he found his delivery location in Laredo. I was stunned when he told me he was not even halfway to Laredo. He had driven two hundred miles the entire day before.



Later in the day, this man called me telling me he was lost. He made his delivery seven hours late, and still had to pick up his back haul. When he arrived there, the people were taking their lunch break. They don't open until ten or eleven and lunch is usually around three in the afternoon, sometimes taking at least two hours.

Krl called to check on this driver and said he definitely had an attitude. He told her he didn't have the patience, the endurance, or the gumption to do this job any more. He ended their conversation by telling her when he get back to Sweetwater he is parking the truck.

Needless to say, that did not make Krl's day. She has loads for that truck to pick up Today, Friday and Monday. In fact, every truck is booked. So that means we fizzed. I talked with Pepa and he told me not to return any loads to vendors, we would get it covered.

I tried to call the disgruntled truck driver, but he failed to answer or return my calls. Krl finally talked with him later in the evening. His day had not gotten any better. On his way back, he got a speeding ticket.

I wanted to tell this man, that everything he had done had only made his job more difficult.

Oh well. This week has been a difficult one!

Have a day!

FATHER, thank YOU for the good days. For the good reports on Memama, that YOU will continue to bless her with YOUR gifts of healing and care. FATHER, I need a lot of help today!

Mondays are the days that take it on the chin so all the others days seem better!

My Monday went from low expectations to low reality.

I finished my office work, retrieved the big truck from the repair shop, took it to Roscoe, and had Pepa run me back to my pickup at the repair shop. My day was good until then. Just when I was entertaining the possibility of getting the lawn mower out, I received a call from a truck driver. He was in a backup truck, having picked up his Monday load while I had his truck in the shop. This man was telling me he needed fuel filters. We discussed the trucks behavior and I had my doubts that fuel filters would remedy the situation but I began developing a plan. At eight minutes after six I walked out of the house to get in my pickup. I had decided to drive to Sweetwater get filters from B-Line and take them to the driver who was on the side of the road between Snyder and Hermleigh. In route, I picked up some starting fluid and other supplies. As I neared Roscoe, I called Pepa to see if he wanted to ride up with me. He did, so I made a quick stop to get him.

When we arrived we made quick work of the filters and soon the little truck was running down the road at 73 mile per hour... ..... . . . for about eight miles, then it began to slow, finally pulling to the side of the road. Once again it was starving for fuel. After repeated attempts and with darkness approaching, we made a quick run to the farm shop to pick up the truck that had been repaired. We returned, pulled the truck with the problem from under the trailer, and put the other truck under it. Finally after everything was readied, we hooked the problem truck with a chain to my company pickup and Pepa towed me in the truck to the farm shop. The truck driver with the load followed in our little convoy.

Crazy thing was I started the truck with the problem, and it ran almost all the way to the farm shop.

By the time we were through and I got home, ate and cleaned up, it was 12:39 in the morning Tuesday!

Yuk!

When I woke Tuesday morning I looked at the clock and hoped it was wrong. It wasn't. My butt dragged all day!

By Tuesday night I was ready for bed!

Pepa had wanted me to go to the farm to look at truck with the problem, but I was not interested. I just wanted to go home, relax eat supper, spend some time with Krl and got to bed. Actually he wanted me to go out there to put a battery on one of his farm pickups.

Thanks to some pretty violent weather coming through the area, I took advantage and cleared out to Abilene ahead of the weather! I was home before the weather really hit and most of the violent stuff missed our area!

Pepa had been wanting to put his other truck in the mix, so Krl and I finally agreed. The man driving it went to South Texas with me last year. He is an O.K. guy, but is very high maintenance. You have to push him every mile and draw him a picture. So far he has been late, and not followed tarp guidelines which I have given him faxes of the requirements. His stay may be short lived.

I am at the parts store today. Pat is taking Memama to the hand doctor, hopefully some of the pins will be removed today. Special note, Pepa is not accompanying them. He had a day "spelling" yesterday.

Have a day!

FATHER, I need some relief! Make me strong.

Now that'll get your day going!

This morning I walked through the kitchen after rolling our dumpster out, washed my hands, grabbed a paper towel, and headed back for the "office". It was about this point when I saw a tray of left over bacon wrapped, stuffed jalapenos, so I picked one up. Excellent! But I may breathe a little fire!

Krl and I had been talking about doing the jalapenos for a couple of weeks, so one day when I made a jaunt to the store, I picked up a dozen jalapenos, some cream cheese, and some bacon. After that it was just a matter of finding the time.

Yesterday morning I had set all the parts on the kitchen counter to serve as a reminder, and also to let the cream cheese soften.

I began watching my NASCAR race, but when it got a little boring I walked in the kitchen and began washing the peppers. Now I am not sure how is the best and quickest way to remove the seeds and veins from the jalapenos, but I use a small grapefruit knife that is curved on the end. I make a single incision lengthwise and put the pepper between my finger tips and my palm and close my hand enough to gap the pepper open, allowing me access to remove the seeds and veins. Usually I will rinse the inside of the pepper and lay it on paper towels, the cut on the bottom so they will drain any excess water.

I took a break and returned to my race. After a while, I went back to the kitchen. We use a combination cookie press, cake decorating tool to put the cream cheese inside the peppers. I loaded the cream cheese into the tube and forced the plunger forward before locking it in with the trigger mechanism. Krl came in the kitchen, and she would hold the peppers while I injected the cream cheese. When we finished the cream cheese project, I began wrapping the peppers with bacon, securing it with a toothpick.

I started the fire in the pit and in short order I had the stuffed peppers exposed to the fire.

I had positioned the pit where I could watch it from my recliner as I returned to watching the race. There is always a possibility of a flare up especially when the bacon grease begins dripping.

You know those peppers are very good, but they are a lot of work!

And they are not without their hazards. After I had slit the peppers and seeded and de-veined them, I had washed my hands and taken my break when I inadvertently repositioned my eye glasses. I don't think I rubbed my eye, but instantly it was burning horribly. In fact my other eye had sympathy pains and began watering as well. Krl got me a warm wash cloth, but nothing seemed to relieve the burning sensation.

Man, it was worse than any shampoo in the eyes I have ever had. Krl told me that both my eyes were instantly blood shot!

I have driver settlements and billing done except I am waiting for some fuel card transactions to post, then I will print and make my weekly trek to Kinkos. Then it will be a trip to the post office and then probably a run to the truck shop where the big truck is at.

I may have to stuff another trip to Roscoe somewhere in the mix.

I had planned on mowing the yard today, but currently it is raining. We may have to make that determination later in the day if it clears.

Memama and Pepa came by yesterday, they were on their way to Brownwood to check on Robbie and Jesse. Uncle Jess is not doing any worse, but he isn't doing any better either.

Well, I have tapped on lots of keys but I haven't said very much. Have a day!

FATHER, thank YOU for this day and the blessings it holds. Please make me and my week what you want them to be.