Final prep day! Things to do before I leave and things to do before I leave!

Too many last minute projects! We worked Saturday, In 2003 we had a trailer suffer major damage from fire. We muddled through last year without it in the rotation but with the large fall contract looming on the horizon it seemed essential to have it ready. Wednesday we had seven people on the project but it dwindled to three on Thursday and finally two on Friday and Saturday. I was pleased with the end result. All it lacks are the mounting grommets for the lights and plugging them in. Maybe one more hour, if I can secure the parts locally and not have to go to the OEM.

I came to some stark realizations yesterday! First of all, my Dad is a "mean old busterd" (inside family joke). Second, I found that I have always sought but never achieved his approval, no matter what I did. I cannot recall EVER receiving a compliment from him. The closest I have ever been was after a very successful sales call (for the family business) to GP in Atlanta and with other customers between there and Texas, my Mom, on his instructions, put a pair of Ostrich boots in my vehicle. (First thing I looked at was my old boots!??? Did they embarass him or what?) He never expresses affection. Other people tell me things he says but I guess there is some odd far fetched reason that he cannot vocalize them directly. Sad part is it has taken me this far in my life to decide that it shouldn't be that important to me and I have finally made the decision that I am not here to please him! I talked with Krl and then Trc called and we talked. I told them, and I will tell Kali, Ollie and Rian that should I ever get that difficult and hard, please shoot me! It really bothers me that I might end up like that! Is it in the genes? The thing that really miffs me is when I let him push my buttons and I fall into his trap. Deliver me!

I am not looking forward to mixing this contract work with family. I use, as sub-contractors, some family and family equipment. This is asking for problems because past history has always shown when the parameters get stretched, family thinks they are entitled. Call me crazy, but I expect more from family, not less!

I may be out of blogsphere the next few days. My ISP at St. Lawrence made some changes since last year and it appears I may have to change providers to remain local to the area. I guess you could say that my St. Lawrence location fell through the cracks of the ISP's reorganization.

FATHER, thank YOU for it all! For YOUR love, YOUR mercy, YOUR grace, for JESUS! Help me to set my eyes, my goals not on things in this world and this life but on the here-after and life eternal. FATHER, bring me closure to the open wounds, strengthen my resolve. Guide me. Direct me. Fill me with YOUR spirit. FATHER, as we begin the fall contract in earnest, I ask YOUR blessing for a safe and successful contract. Be with all that are involved. I ask for patience and tolerance, and for wisdom and guidance as I make decisions that affect many. Help me to be fair and just. Help me to be accountable to the job boss but more importantly to YOU. I continue to ask for closure for KRL. I pray for her former manager and his family. Bless them. Help us all to work through this muddled mess. I thank YOU for the opportunity to take KRL with me on this job. I pray that YOU will purify our hearts and minds. I pray for Rene', Carol, Michelle and Aimee, bless them and heal them. Be with T.J. in her surgery Monday. FATHER help her to realize YOU are giving her a do-over. Be with those who have suffered loss from the hurricane season, protect those in the path of Jean. I pray for the needs of our spiritual family. Bless them and fill them FATHER. Help me as I strive to be worthy of YOUR love!